Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and grammatically correct, give a clear topic sentence then a brief reason and a specific example. Avoid awkward phrases and grammar errors (e.g. “is really impressed me”) and keep to 2–4 sentences. Use linking words like “but” or “however” correctly.

例: I don’t usually take many photos, but I do sometimes photograph landscapes. For example, when I come across a stunning sunset over the hills, I’ll take a few pictures to remember it. I mainly take them for memories rather than as a hobby.

提案: Correct small vocabulary and clarity issues (e.g. ‘Lulu areas’ → ‘rural areas’). Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one linked specific reason and a short example. Maintain natural phrasing and stay within 2–4 sentences.

例: I prefer rural areas and open landscapes because the greenery helps me relax. For instance, going for walks in the countryside after work helps me unwind and clear my thoughts. The quiet and fresh air are what I like most.

提案: Make the answer grammatically correct and more specific: give a clear topic sentence, a concise reason, and one concrete example. Avoid vague phrases like “more quality” and correct word forms (e.g. “mountain relates” → “mountain ranges”). Use linking words like “because” and “for example.”

例: I prefer views in other countries because they often offer different scenery and cultural experiences. For example, I’ve seen many travel posts about dramatic mountain ranges and picturesque coastal towns that I’d love to visit and photograph. Seeing new landscapes inspires me more than familiar ones.

× Well, to be honest, taking pictures is not my cup of tea, however I occasionally take pictures of landscapes whenever is really impressed me.

✓ Well, to be honest, taking pictures is not my cup of tea; however, I occasionally take pictures of landscapes whenever something really impresses me.

The original sentence uses 'is really impressed me', which incorrectly mixes present passive 'is impressed' with past 'me'. The verb should be in simple present to match 'whenever' (a time reference for habitual actions) and the subject 'something' is needed. Use 'impresses' (third person singular present) to agree with 'something'. Also add a semicolon or period and a comma after 'however' for correct punctuation and clause separation.

× I prefer Lulu areas and open landscapes because seeing green fields and trees gives me a sense of peace and relaxation.

✓ I prefer rural areas and open landscapes because seeing green fields and trees gives me a sense of peace and relaxation.

The word 'Lulu' is incorrect; likely intended word is 'rural' (an adjective). This is a lexical error categorized under adjective use. Replace with 'rural' to convey contrast with urban areas. No tense change is needed.

× Well, I prefer landscape in other countries because they often offer more quality and new experiences.

✓ Well, I prefer landscapes in other countries because they often offer higher quality and new experiences.

'Landscape' should be plural ('landscapes') to match the plural idea of different views in other countries. Also 'more quality' is unidiomatic; use 'higher quality' or 'better quality' to correctly modify a noun. This fixes number agreement and adjective collocation.

× For example, I have seen many advertisement and travel posts on social media about mountain relates and coastal towns and I'd like to see.

✓ For example, I have seen many advertisements and travel posts on social media about mountain regions and coastal towns, and I'd like to see them.

Multiple quantifier and noun form errors: 'many advertisement' should be plural 'many advertisements'. 'Mountain relates' is incorrect; likely 'mountain regions' or 'mountain-related places' fits. The clause ends with 'I'd like to see' but lacks an object; add 'them' to refer back to the places. Also add a comma before 'and' to separate clauses.