Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: คำแนะนำ: ให้ตอบตรงประเด็นด้วยประโยคหัวข้อ (topic sentence) ที่ชัดเจน แล้วตามด้วยรายละเอียดสนับสนุนที่สั้น กระชับ และใช้ linking words เพื่อความลื่นไหล เช่น because, so, therefore หลีกเลี่ยงความซ้ำและข้อผิดพลาดไวยากรณ์ (picture → pictures, take the picture → take pictures) ควรจำกัดไม่เกิน 4–5 ประโยค และเสริมตัวอย่างเฉพาะเจาะจงว่าคุณถ่ายภาพแบบไหนหรือเมื่อไหร่

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. I often take landscape photos because they help me remember places and feelings. For example, when I visited a mountain last year, I photographed the sunrise to show my friends how beautiful it was. Therefore, photos are a way for me to share moments without many words.

提案: คำแนะนำ: เริ่มด้วยประโยคชัดเจนว่า you prefer rural areas, ตามด้วยเหตุผลที่เป็นระบบ ใช้คำศัพท์ที่ถูกต้องและธรรมชาติ (e.g., 'texture of the grass' แทน 'grain of grass') และหลีกเลี่ยงการพูดซ้ำ เช่น 'pass pass' ควรใช้ linking words เช่น because, so or which เพื่อเชื่อมเหตุผลและผลลัพธ์

例: I prefer views in rural areas because nature feels more vivid in photos. The scent and texture of grass and the abundance of trees create atmosphere, so my pictures make me feel like I am standing there. For instance, a photo of a quiet field at sunset often reminds me of the fresh air and calm mood.

提案: คำแนะนำ: แก้ความผิดพลาดทางคำศัพท์และไวยากรณ์ (wheel → well?; should be 'I prefer views in my own country'; 'countries' → 'country') และให้เหตุผลชัดเจนว่าทำไม ร่วมกับตัวอย่างเฉพาะ การใช้ linking words เช่น although, however จะช่วยให้ตอบสมเหตุสมผลมากขึ้น จำกัดความยาวและหลีกเลี่ยงประโยคไม่สมบูรณ์

例: I prefer views in my own country because its natural landscapes suit my taste. Although I have traveled abroad, I often feel something is missing compared with home. For example, the light and colors of the countryside back home always make my photos feel more intimate and familiar.

× I like to take picture of different views because I think that every time I take a picture is also captured in my memory.

✓ I like to take pictures of different views because I think that every time I take a picture it is also captured in my memory.

The noun 'picture' should be plural 'pictures' after 'take' when referring to taking photos in general. Also the clause 'every time I take a picture is also captured' is missing the subject 'it' for the verb 'is captured'. Suggestion: use plural for general actions (take pictures) and include the pronoun 'it' to refer back to 'a picture'. Grammar problem type ID: 1

× The main reason I take the picture is I can't talk to my friends but I can say how beautiful it was.

✓ The main reason I take pictures is that I can't always tell my friends, but I can show them how beautiful it was.

The original sentence has awkward structure and missing connector 'that' after 'is'. 'Take the picture' should be general 'take pictures'. 'I can't talk to my friends' is too literal; 'I can't always tell my friends' or 'I can't be with my friends' may fit better. Also use 'show them' or 'convey' instead of 'say' when referring to pictures. Suggestion: add 'that' after 'is' and rephrase for clarity. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× I prefer view in rural areas because I think that the smell of grass, the grain of grass and the plenty of trees can pass pass through the pictures and can make me feel I stand in that place more than the view of building.

✓ I prefer views in rural areas because I think that the smell of grass, the texture of the grass, and the many trees can come through the pictures and make me feel like I am standing in that place more than a view of buildings.

Use plural 'views' when speaking generally. 'The grain of grass' is better as 'the texture of the grass'. 'Plenty of trees' should be 'many trees'. 'Pass pass' is a repetition error; use 'come through' or 'come across'. Add 'like' before 'I am standing' and adjust 'view of building' to 'view of buildings' or 'a view of buildings'. Suggestion: use plurals and natural collocations (texture, many trees, come through, feel like I am standing). Grammar problem type ID: 1

× I prefer wheel in my own countries because I think that natural in my country is the best in the world.

✓ I prefer to travel in my own country because I think that nature in my country is the best in the world.

'Prefer wheel' is incorrect; likely meant 'prefer to travel' or 'prefer places'. 'Countries' should be singular 'country' when referring to the speaker's own country. 'Natural' is an adjective; use the noun 'nature'. Suggestion: use correct verb phrase 'prefer to travel' and correct noun forms 'country' and 'nature'. Grammar problem type ID: 11

× I have traveled along the world but I feel that is missing something that I can find in my countries.

✓ I have traveled around the world, but I feel that something is missing that I can only find in my country.

Use 'around the world' rather than 'along the world'. 'Countries' should be singular 'country' when referring to the speaker's own nation. Word order 'I feel that is missing something' is incorrect; use 'something is missing'. Suggestion: use common prepositional phrase 'around the world' and correct singular 'country'. Grammar problem type ID: 1

× Every time I came back to my country, I feel that.

✓ Every time I come back to my country, I feel that.

Tense mismatch: 'Every time' is a habitual action and should use present simple 'come back' not past 'came back'. 'I feel that' is fine in present simple. Suggestion: use present simple for habitual actions (every time + present simple). Grammar problem type ID: 6