Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and clear: start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct word choice and word order are needed (e.g., 'flower sky' and 'taking powder' are unclear).

例: Yes, I do. I enjoy photographing different scenes because I like capturing flowers, skies and people. For example, I often take photos of flowers in my local park and candid shots of people walking, which helps me practice composition and lighting.

提案: Give a clear preference in one sentence, then support it with specific reasons linked by connectors. Avoid repetition and unclear words (e.g., 'Lulu LDR', 'wind of little earlier').

例: I prefer rural areas. This is because the countryside offers more plants, open skies and fresh breezes, so I can relax and take better landscape photos. For instance, I like walking along country paths to photograph wildflowers at sunset.

提案: Answer directly and clearly: state your preference, then give a concise reason with specific detail. Avoid filler words and unclear phrases ('upload', 'how beautiful a role').

例: I prefer views in my own country. Since I know its landscapes well, I appreciate familiar places like nearby mountains and coastal views. For example, I love visiting a local seaside cliff where I know the best spots for sunrise photography.

× Yes, I do because I can enjoy many kinds of views such as flower sky or people because and also I like taking powder naturally so that's why I think so.

✓ Yes, I do because I can enjoy many kinds of views such as flowers, the sky, or people, and I also like taking photos naturally, so that's why I think so.

The original sentence misuses conjunctions ('because' repeated and misplaced) and lacks proper connectors. Also several noun forms are incorrect (flower -> flowers; sky needs article 'the' in this list), and 'powder' is likely a wrong word for 'photos' or 'pictures'. The corrected sentence removes redundant 'because', uses 'and' to join independent clauses, pluralizes 'flower', adds commas to separate items, and replaces 'powder' with 'photos'. Suggestion: avoid repeating 'because', list items clearly with commas and 'or', and choose correct nouns (photo/picture).

× I prefer Lulu LDR because I can enjoy many environments such as plants, flowers or sky and also I I like the way wind of little earlier so that's why I think so.

✓ I prefer rural areas because I can enjoy many environments such as plants, flowers, or the sky, and I also like the way the breeze feels early in the morning, so that's why I think so.

The original sentence has incorrect noun phrase 'Lulu LDR' (likely 'rural'), missing articles ('the sky'), repetition 'I I', and awkward phrasing 'the way wind of little earlier'. Tense is present and appropriate, but wording and article usage are incorrect. The correction fixes 'rural', adds 'the' before 'sky', removes the repeated pronoun, and rephrases the breeze clause to natural present-tense wording. Suggestion: use correct vocabulary, include articles with singular/mass nouns when needed, and avoid repeating words; express sensations with verbs like 'feels'.

× I definitely prefer to my country umm one of the reason I've never been to the upload so I don't know about what how how beautiful a role so I prefer to Japanese.

✓ I definitely prefer my country. One reason is that I've never been to other countries, so I don't know how beautiful they are; therefore, I prefer Japan.

Multiple errors: incorrect preposition 'prefer to my country' should be 'prefer my country' or 'prefer living in my country'; 'one of the reason' should be 'one reason' or 'one of the reasons'; 'the upload' is wrong word choice for 'other countries'; 'how how' repeated; 'a role' incorrect; 'I prefer to Japanese' wrong structure and demonym. The correction fixes prepositions, noun phrases, and word choice, and splits into two sentences for clarity. Suggestion: use 'prefer X' without 'to' when X is noun phrase, use 'one reason' or 'one of the reasons', and use correct terms like 'other countries' and the country name 'Japan'.