Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be natural and grammatical: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two concise supporting details using linking words. Correct tense and word order (e.g. 'I always carry my phone' not 'take a photo is my phone always'). Avoid repetition and unclear phrases like 'when I was in trouble.'

例: Yes, I love taking photos of different views. I always carry my phone and enjoy capturing moments with my family and friends, because photographs help me preserve happy memories.

提案: Answer the question directly with a clear topic sentence, then provide a specific reason/example. Use correct vocabulary ('urban'/'rural') and clearer phrases ('I prefer to capture the moment'). Use a linking word such as 'because' to connect idea and example.

例: I don't have a strong preference between urban and rural views because I prefer to capture the moment wherever I am. For example, on my last trip I photographed a quiet beach to remember the atmosphere.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence and correct grammar (e.g. 'I prefer views in other countries'). Use linking words ('because', 'for example') and provide a specific detail about a place or a memory. Fix plural/singular and verb forms ('discovered' or 'discover' with 'to').

例: I prefer views in other countries because I enjoy discovering new landscapes. For example, on my last trip to Hawaii I took many photos of the coast, which are beautiful memories.

× Absolutely take a photo is my phone always because I love take a picture with my family and my friends.

✓ Absolutely, taking photos is always on my phone because I love taking pictures with my family and my friends.

The original sentence has incorrect word order and missing gerund forms. 'take a photo is my phone always' is ungrammatical; use 'taking photos is always on my phone' or better 'taking photos is always with me on my phone.' Also use the gerund 'taking' after expressions of preference ('I love taking pictures'). Suggestion: reorder to subject + verb + complement and use gerunds for continuous activities. Grammar problem type ID:26

× Especially when when I was in trouble because I found photography help to keep memories.

✓ Especially when I was in trouble, I found that photography helped me keep memories.

Two issues: unnecessary repeated 'when' and incorrect verb forms. 'found photography help to keep memories' should be 'found that photography helped me keep memories' — use past tense 'helped' to match 'was' and include object 'me' after 'helped'. Also include conjunction 'that' for clarity. Grammar problem type ID:8

× I don't have a preference between Reuben and real views because I prefer to capture the momentum to remember it, like when I take a picture of the beach in my last travel.

✓ I don't have a preference between urban and rural views because I prefer to capture moments to remember them, like when I took a picture of the beach on my last trip.

Several errors: 'Reuben and real' likely intended 'urban and rural.' 'capture the momentum' is incorrect collocation; use 'capture moments.' 'to remember it' should be 'to remember them' to match plural 'moments.' Tense consistency: 'in my last travel' is unnatural — use 'on my last trip' and past tense 'took' to match past event. Grammar problem type ID:26

× I realize you in the older country because I love discover the new landscape, like when I take a picture in my last travel in Hawaii.

✓ I prefer being in other countries because I love discovering new landscapes, like when I took pictures on my last trip to Hawaii.

'I realize you in the older country' is incorrect; likely meant 'I prefer being in other countries.' Use gerund 'discovering' after 'love.' Tense consistency: 'take a picture in my last travel' should be past: 'took pictures on my last trip.' Also 'older' should be 'other' and 'travel' -> 'trip.' Grammar problem type ID:6

× That's a beautiful memories.

✓ Those are beautiful memories.

Mismatch between singular article 'a' and plural noun 'memories.' Use plural demonstrative 'Those' and plural verb 'are' to agree with 'memories.' Alternatively, 'That's a beautiful memory.' Grammar problem type ID:13}]}