Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence, reduce hesitations, correct grammar, and give one or two concise supporting details using linking words. Be specific about what you like photographing and why. For example, avoid fillers (uh, umm), use correct verb forms, and connect ideas with words like “for example” or “because.”

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, I often photograph small street scenes, such as tree shadows or people walking, because I like capturing everyday moments. I also enjoy photographing movement, as it helps me show the energy of a scene.

提案: Begin with a clear preference or a balanced statement, avoid repetition and vague phrases, and provide specific comparisons using linking words like “however” or “on the other hand.” Correct grammar (e.g., 'urban areas' not 'the urban area') and use concise supporting reasons. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: I enjoy both urban and rural views, but for different reasons. In urban areas I like photographing people and interactions because there is a lot of life and variety, whereas in rural areas I prefer natural landscapes and quiet scenes because they feel peaceful.

提案: Give a direct answer first (yes/no or preference), then explain briefly with clear grammar and specific examples. Avoid unclear phrases and invented terms. Use linking words like “for example” and explain why foreign views might be more interesting (e.g., culture, architecture). Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

例: I don't have a strong preference, but I enjoy visiting other countries because they offer different cultures and architectural styles. For example, although some landscapes in China resemble parts of Switzerland, traveling abroad lets me experience new traditions and colors that make photos more varied.

× I uh, even better with motions.

✓ I also prefer motion shots.

The original sentence uses incorrect structure and word choice. 'Even better with motions' is ungrammatical; use 'prefer' plus a noun phrase: 'prefer motion shots' or 'prefer taking pictures of motion'. Use 'also' instead of 'even' to add information. Suggestion: say 'I also prefer motion shots' or 'I especially like photographing motion.'

× I think it's catch up, the moment of my life and it's very beautiful to see our walk of life through.

✓ I think it captures a moment in my life, and it's beautiful to see our life journey through photographs.

Multiple structural problems: 'it's catch up' is incorrect verb form and collocation; 'the moment of my life' needs article and preposition 'in'; 'our walk of life through' is awkward. Use 'captures' (third person singular present) and 'a moment in my life'. Combine clauses clearly. Suggestion: use 'captures a moment in my life' and 'see our life journey through photographs.'

× It's different and has a specific specific beauty in age area.

✓ They're different and each has a specific beauty in each area.

Problems: 'It's' singular refers to 'them both' (plural), so subject-pronoun mismatch; 'specific specific' repetition; 'in age area' is incorrect phrase and likely meant 'in each area' or 'in different areas'. Fix pronoun to 'They're' or restructure to 'Both are different'. Suggestion: 'Both are different and each has a specific beauty.'

× I think in the urban area I can see a lot of people and how they interact with each other and in the in the rural area there's more kind of nature view.

✓ I think in urban areas I can see a lot of people and how they interact with each other, while in rural areas there are more natural scenes.

Issues: unnecessary articles 'the urban area'/'the rural area'—use plural or no article for general statements; 'more kind of nature view' is ungrammatical. Also 'in the in the' duplication. Use 'natural scenes' or 'views of nature.' Suggestion: use 'in urban areas' and 'in rural areas there are more natural scenes.'

× While the scenery are a similar in some cases, for example we got a lot of small Switzerland small friends in all over China.

✓ While the scenery is similar in some cases; for example, we have many small 'Switzerland-like' places all over China.

'Scenery' is an uncountable noun and takes singular verb 'is', not 'are'. 'A similar' is wrong; use 'similar' without 'a'. 'We got' is informal and should be 'we have'. 'Small Switzerland small friends' is unclear—likely 'small Switzerland-like places'. Suggestion: 'While the scenery is similar in some cases, for example we have many small Switzerland-like places across China.'

× But I think it just said multi multiple culture that are trying to that add more flavor to.

✓ But I think it reflects multiple cultures that add more flavor to the scenery.

This sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'It just said' is wrong tense and structure; 'multi multiple culture' is redundant; 'that are trying to that add more flavor to' is nonsensical. Rephrase to 'it reflects multiple cultures that add more flavor to the scenery' or 'that add variety.' Suggestion: use 'reflects multiple cultures that add more flavor' or 'shows many cultures that enrich the scene.'