Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, correct grammar (e.g. tense and article use), and add one specific detail or example. Use linking words if adding details.

例: Yes, I love taking photos of different views. For example, I often take pictures of mountain slopes covered in wildflowers—pink and purple blossoms create a striking contrast against the dark rock—because I enjoy capturing vivid colours and peaceful scenes.

提案: Give a direct answer first, then support it with two specific reasons. Improve grammar (correct word forms and articles) and avoid filler words. Use linking words like 'because' and 'also'.

例: I prefer views in rural areas. I live in a village called Kalinagar, and I find the countryside much quieter and cleaner than the city because there is less traffic and more green space, which makes it more relaxing to photograph.

提案: Answer directly, then give a clear reason with one specific example. Avoid vague phrases like 'international nations' and improve sentence structure. Use comparative language correctly.

例: I usually prefer views in other countries because I often see more diverse landscapes and colourful gardens in travel photos. For instance, photos of Japanese gardens or Dutch tulip fields look especially striking, with organised flower beds and vivid colours that I don't often see at home.

× Yes, I am very fascinated with the view which came from the side of mountain with the very nice colour of flowers like black, pink and I'm very fascinated with clicking the picture of different kind of views.

✓ Yes, I am very fascinated by the view that comes from the side of the mountain, with very nice colors of flowers such as black and pink, and I really enjoy taking pictures of different kinds of views.

Errors: incorrect preposition 'fascinated with' (use 'fascinated by'); tense/verb form 'came' should be 'comes' to match present general statement (present tense issue, ID 6); missing articles 'the side of mountain' needs 'the' and 'mountain' (article error, ID 22); 'colour' to 'colors' (pluralization and American/British spelling not required but plural is needed) and 'different kind of views' should be 'different kinds of views' (singular/plural issue, ID 1). Suggestion: use 'fascinated by', keep present simple for general facts: 'comes', include necessary articles 'the', and match singular/plural: 'kinds of views'.

× I, uh, so if we talk about the rural areas, I'm just now living in my rural area which named Kalinagar.

✓ I currently live in a rural area called Kalinagar.

Errors: wordy and awkward structure 'I, uh, so if we talk about...' is unnecessary (sentence structure error, ID 26); 'I'm just now living' is nonstandard — use 'I currently live' (present tense issue, ID 6); 'my rural area which named Kalinagar' lacks article and correct relative clause — use 'a rural area called Kalinagar' (article error, ID 22 and incorrect use of relative clause). Suggestion: keep it concise and use 'I currently live in a rural area called Kalinagar.'

× And if we talk about the urban area, they are having a very noisy and traffic conjugation.

✓ As for urban areas, they are very noisy and congested with traffic.

Errors: 'if we talk about the urban area' should be plural 'urban areas' to match meaning (singular/plural issue, ID 1); 'they are having' is incorrect for states — use 'they are' (verb tense/usage, ID 6); 'traffic conjugation' is wrong word choice — correct word is 'congestion' (incorrect use of adjectives/words, ID 13). Also pronoun reference 'they' is acceptable for 'urban areas' after pluralizing. Suggestion: say 'urban areas are very noisy and congested with traffic.'

× So I just usually prefer the views of rural area are much more much comfortable and more much environmental free.

✓ So I usually prefer rural views because they are much more comfortable and more environmentally friendly.

Errors: awkward and ungrammatical structure 'prefer the views of rural area are...' (sentence structure error, ID 26); missing article 'the rural area' and pluralization 'rural areas' (article error, ID 22 and singular/plural issue, ID 1); repeated 'much more much' is redundant and incorrect (incorrect use of adverbs, ID 13); 'environmental free' is incorrect — use 'environmentally friendly' (incorrect use of adjectives/adverbs, ID 13). Suggestion: restructure sentence to 'I usually prefer rural views because they are much more comfortable and environmentally friendly.'

× So if we talk about my nation, I usually prefer to watch the views of another nation because in other nations they are looking very fascinating in the pictures and they are looking very environmental free pictures because the flowers which are in the international nations that are much beautiful than in my nation.

✓ When it comes to my country, I usually prefer views from other countries because they look more attractive in photos and seem more environmentally pleasant; the flowers in other countries are much more beautiful than those in my country.

Errors: 'if we talk about my nation' can be 'when it comes to my country' (style); 'prefer to watch the views of another nation' should be 'prefer views from other countries' (preposition and pluralization, IDs 11 and 1); 'in other nations they are looking very fascinating in the pictures' incorrect pronoun and verb form — use 'they look more attractive in photos' (third person/present tense issues, IDs 2 and 6); 'they are looking very environmental free pictures' is ungrammatical — use 'seem more environmentally pleasant' (incorrect adjective/adverb, ID 13); 'the flowers which are in the international nations that are much beautiful than in my nation' has relative clause and comparison errors — use 'the flowers in other countries are much more beautiful than those in my country' (comparison error, ID 25 and incorrect pronoun reference, ID 12). Suggestion: simplify and use correct comparative structure 'much more beautiful than those in my country.'