Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more coherent and correct grammar; give a clear topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words and correct word choices (e.g., "lighting," "urban scenes"). Avoid sentence fragments. Aim for 2–4 sentences overall.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because I work as a photographer and often go out to shoot. For example, I photograph urban scenes to practice composition and experiment with perspective and lighting, which has helped me improve my skills.

提案: Correct grammatical errors and clarify vocabulary. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add a specific reason and one example. Replace incorrect words ("silly") with the intended noun (e.g., "scenery" or "beauty"). Use a linking word such as "because" or "so" to connect ideas.

例: I prefer rural areas because they are much more peaceful and offer beautiful natural scenery. For instance, I enjoy photographing rolling hills and quiet streams, which help me relax and concentrate on my work.

提案: This answer is generally clear but can be improved with more natural phrasing and a brief supporting example. Use a concise topic sentence, then add a specific reason and an example while avoiding redundancy ("I feel familiar and comfortable" can be tightened).

例: I prefer views in my own country because I know the landscapes well and feel comfortable photographing familiar locations. For example, I often visit my hometown riverbanks and old streets, where I know the best times for soft morning light.

× Urban scene to practice conversation and experiment with perspective and lightning, which helped me improve.

✓ I go to urban scenes to practice composition and experiment with perspective and lighting, which has helped me improve.

The original fragment lacks a main verb and has word choice problems. 'Urban scene to practice...' is a sentence fragment (sentence structure error). Also 'conversation' is mistaken for 'composition' or 'photography composition', and 'lightning' (electric discharge) should be 'lighting' (illumination). Use plural 'urban scenes' with the verb 'go' to form a complete sentence and present perfect 'has helped' to link past improvement to current state. Suggestion: write full clauses with a subject and verb, choose correct photography vocabulary, and use 'lighting' not 'lightning'.

× I prefer a rural areas because they are much more peaceful and there is a lot of natural silly.

✓ I prefer rural areas because they are much more peaceful and there is a lot of natural beauty.

Errors include incorrect article+noun combination ('a rural areas' mixes singular article with plural noun) and wrong word choice ('silly' is incorrect; likely intended 'scenery' or 'beauty'). This is an article error (and word choice). Remove the article before the plural noun: 'rural areas'. Also replace 'silly' with 'scenery' or 'beauty'. Suggestion: match articles to noun number (no 'a' before plural) and choose context-appropriate vocabulary (use 'scenery' or 'beauty' for landscapes).

× I prefer my home country because I have lived in my hometown my whole life and I feel really familiar and comfortable there.

✓ I prefer my home country because I have lived in my hometown my whole life and I feel really familiar and comfortable there.

The sentence is mostly correct, but 'feel really familiar' is awkward: 'familiar' describes a person knowing something, not how one feels. This is a present tense usage issue and incorrect adjective use. Better: 'I feel very familiar with it' or 'I feel very comfortable and familiar there.' Suggestion: use 'familiar with' when describing feeling acquainted with a place, and keep tense consistent (present perfect 'have lived' correctly expresses life-long experience).