Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Avoid redundant phrases (e.g. "of course", repeated "different"). Also vary vocabulary (use "landscapes" or "scenery") and keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different landscapes. For example, when I travel I often photograph coastal views and city skylines so I can remember each place, and I usually choose the golden hour for better light.

提案: Give a direct preference first, then contrast with a specific reason using linking words. Remove fillers ("so that's it") and avoid repetition. Keep it to 2–3 sentences and include a concrete example or situation.

例: I usually prefer rural views because they are peaceful and refreshing. However, I also enjoy urban cityscapes when I want vibrant nightlife or interesting architecture, for example when I visit downtown areas to photograph skyline views.

提案: Answer directly and then explain with a clear supporting detail. Avoid vague phrases like "live for a moment" and redundant words. Use comparative language to describe specific differences (e.g. architecture, landscape, culture). Limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: I prefer the views in my own country because they feel familiar and meaningful to me. However, I also enjoy visiting other countries to compare features like architecture and natural scenery, for instance noticing how coastal towns abroad have different styles and plant life.

× Personally, I like taking pictures of different views and sceneries, especially when I go to different places or travel in different countries because of course it will give me memories to look back.

✓ Personally, I like taking pictures of different views and scenery, especially when I go to different places or travel to different countries, because it gives me memories to look back on.

The noun 'sceneries' is uncountable; use 'scenery'. Use 'travel to' rather than 'travel in' when referring to visiting other countries. The clause 'because of course it will give me memories to look back' is awkward and mixes tenses; use present simple 'gives' to express a general truth and add the preposition 'on' after 'look back'. Also add a comma before 'because' for clarity.

× There are times that I prefer the urban areas especially you can see the cityscapes when traveling, but there are also times where where I prefer the rural areas especially when I feel so tired of the busy streets in the city. So that's it.

✓ There are times when I prefer urban areas, especially because you can see the cityscapes when traveling, but there are also times when I prefer rural areas, especially when I feel tired of the busy streets in the city.

Use 'when' not 'that' or 'where' to introduce times. 'Urban areas' and 'rural areas' do not need 'the' here. Remove the duplicated 'where'. 'Especially you can see' is awkward; use 'especially because you can see' or restructure the clause. 'So that's it' is informal and unnecessary in this answer.

× Of course, I prefer the view in our country, but also it is nice to see that you can experience and also live for a moment or for a while the views in the different countries and you can really see the difference of your country from the country you want to go to.

✓ Of course, I prefer the views in my country, but it is also nice to experience and live for a while in other countries, because you can really see the differences between your country and the country you visit.

Use 'my country' instead of 'our country' to match the speaker perspective. 'The view' should be plural 'views' to match the context. 'Experience and also live for a moment or for a while the views' is ungrammatical; reorder to 'experience and live for a while in other countries.' Use 'differences between' rather than 'difference of...from'. Replace 'the country you want to go to' with the more natural 'the country you visit'.