Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence (Yes, I do), then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid hesitations and incorrect words (e.g. “him picture”, “generation”). Focus on accurate nouns and short, coherent sentences.

例: Yes, I do. I enjoy taking photos whenever I visit a new place because each view is unique. For example, I like capturing city skylines at sunset and quiet countryside scenes in the morning, which help me remember the atmosphere.

提案: Give a clear direct answer and use precise vocabulary and linking words. Avoid fillers (uh) and incorrect adjectives (e.g. “speedful,” “seafood atmosphere”). Provide a concise reason and a specific example in one or two supporting sentences.

例: I prefer rural areas. They are quieter and less crowded, which helps me relax; for example, I visit a seaside village most weekends to enjoy peaceful walks and fresh seafood markets.

提案: Answer directly and correct grammar: state your preference, give a reason and a specific example. Avoid unclear phrases and tense mistakes. Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example' to make the response coherent.

例: I prefer views in my own country because Vietnam has many regions I haven’t seen yet. For example, I hope to visit the northern mountains and the Central Highlands next year to photograph their landscapes.

× I always take him picture and whenever I visit, uh, other place because it's very interesting and he may relax and each place has an our unique generation for a very interesting for me.

✓ I always take pictures whenever I visit other places because it's very interesting and they help me relax; each place has its own unique charm which I find very interesting.

The student misused pronouns and possessives (him picture, he may relax, our unique generation). Use 'pictures' (plural) for multiple photos, 'they' to refer to pictures/places, and 'its own' for singular possessive referring to 'each place'. Also 'generation' is incorrect word choice; 'charm' fits better. Ensure consistent pluralization and correct pronouns.'

× In my opinion, I prefer much more for rural areas.

✓ In my opinion, I prefer rural areas much more.

The verb 'prefer' does not take the preposition 'for' before the object. Place the object ('rural areas') directly after 'prefer' and move adverb 'much more' after it for natural word order.'

× UH should agree because it's very quiet and uh speedful and is the best way to ease my mind some UH.

✓ I think so because they are very quiet and peaceful, and they are the best way to ease my mind.

'speedful' is not a correct adjective; the intended word is 'peaceful'. 'Should agree' is unnatural here—use 'I think so'. Use plural pronoun 'they' to refer to 'rural areas'. Remove filler words and correct word order.'

× For example, I always go to rural area every weekend to enjoy the seafood atmosphere.

✓ For example, I always go to rural areas every weekend to enjoy the fresh atmosphere and seafood.

Use plural 'rural areas' or 'a rural area' consistently. 'Seafood atmosphere' is awkward; likely meant 'seafood' or 'the fresh atmosphere and seafood'. Adjust nouns to match intended meaning and maintain plural agreement.'

× I was born in be grace in Vietnam, so different ways.

✓ I was born and raised in Vietnam, so my views are different.

The original phrase 'born in be grace' is unintelligible and likely a mistaken phrase for 'born and raised'. 'So different ways' lacks a subject and verb; complete the idea by specifying 'so my views are different.' Ensure clear subject-verb structure.'

× I always refer for my country view.

✓ I always prefer the views of my own country.

'Refer for' is incorrect collocation. Use 'prefer' to express preference and 'the views of my own country' or 'my country's views' for clarity. Adjust article 'the' for specificity.'

× I there are many place I have never go to in my country, so I want to visit there sometime to uh.

✓ There are many places I have never been to in my country, so I want to visit them sometime.

Use plural 'places'. The present perfect passive 'have never been to' is required rather than 'have never go to'. Replace 'visit there' with 'visit them' to refer back to 'places'. Remove filler 'uh' and ensure correct tense and pronoun reference.'