Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using a linking word. Avoid filler or sentence fragments.

例: Yes, I do. I often look out the window because I get bored on long journeys, and I enjoy spotting interesting landscapes such as fields, rivers, or small villages. For example, last month I watched a series of colorful farmlands while traveling to my hometown.

提案: Make the answer more structured and specific: give a clear reason, then a brief example of what you photograph. Use linking words for coherence and avoid repeating the same idea.

例: Yes, definitely. I like taking photos to capture moments and remember where I was, so I often photograph sunsets, interesting buildings, or unusual cloud formations. For instance, on a recent trip I photographed an old stone bridge lit by evening light, and I still enjoy looking at that photo.

提案: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence, then support it with specific reasons and an example. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid trailing fragments.

例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy exploring and outdoor activities like hiking and climbing. For example, I often spend weekends trekking local trails to challenge myself and enjoy the views, although I like visiting the sea for relaxation occasionally.

× Yes, I love to because when I'm traveling by bus or car I really feel boring so I just look out the window and look for amazing views outside and. The nature.

✓ Yes, I love it because when I'm traveling by bus or car I really feel bored, so I just look out the window and look for amazing views of nature outside.

The original uses 'feel boring' which is incorrect; 'boring' describes something that causes boredom, while the speaker feels 'bored' (an emotional state). Also 'love to' requires an object; use 'love it' or 'love doing that'. The fragment 'and. The nature.' is ungrammatical and should be combined into 'views of nature outside'. Suggestions: use the adjective 'bored' for feelings, include an appropriate object after 'love', and merge sentence fragments into a complete clause.

× Yes, definitely, because I'm so into it and really whenever I see some scenery views, I love to take photos and to capture all the moments so that whenever I look for them I remember the moment.

✓ Yes, definitely, because I'm very into it and whenever I see scenery I love taking photos to capture the moments so that when I look at them I remember the time.

The phrase 'love to take photos and to capture all the moments' is acceptable but more natural is using the -ing form after 'love' when describing habitual actions: 'love taking photos'. Also 'whenever I look for them' is wrong collocation; use 'look at them' or 'look through them'. 'Scenery views' is redundant; 'scenery' or 'views' alone is sufficient. Suggestions: use gerunds after verbs of preference for habitual actions, fix collocations ('look at'), and avoid redundant noun pairs.

× I really love mountains because I love to explore more and want some adventure in my life so the mountains are best for me because I love to do some activities like climbing so.

✓ I really love the mountains because I enjoy exploring and want some adventure in my life, so the mountains are best for me since I like activities such as climbing.

Use 'the mountains' with the definite article when speaking generally about mountains as a category. 'Love to explore more and want some adventure' mixes forms; make them parallel: 'enjoy exploring and want adventure'. The trailing 'so.' is a fragment; combine clauses and avoid repetition of 'love'. Use 'such as' for examples rather than 'like' in formal speech. Suggestions: add 'the' before plural geographical nouns when appropriate, maintain parallel structure, and avoid sentence fragments and repetition.

× But the seas are also good.

✓ But the sea is also nice.

'Seas' plural is possible but in contrast to 'the mountains' it's more natural to say 'the sea' when contrasting a general preference between mountains and sea. Also 'good' is vague; 'nice' or 'also enjoyable' is more natural. Ensure number agreement and consistent article use when comparing general categories. Suggestions: use 'the sea' to refer generally to seaside environments and choose more natural adjectives like 'nice' or 'enjoyable'.