Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific detail. Avoid repetition (you mentioned outskirts and no tall buildings twice) and fix articles and plurals ("in the outskirts" → "on the outskirts", "farm lands" → "farmland"). Use a linking word when adding detail.

例: No, there are no tall buildings near my home because I live on the outskirts of Antico. For example, my neighborhood is mostly farmland and clusters of trees, so the area feels rural rather than urban.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence about your habit, then add a concise, specific reason. Avoid repeating phrases ("I love") and incorrect tense consistency ("back in my hometown, I live" → "I lived" or "in my hometown" phrase). Use linking words like "because" or "especially when" to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I often photograph buildings, especially skyscrapers, because I admire their shapes and engineering. For example, I enjoy capturing tall glass facades against the sky when I visit the city.

提案: Be natural and precise: start with a clear statement of which building, then add a specific reason and a brief comment about possibility. Correct word choice ("particle" → "particular"). Keep it to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like "because" or "although."

例: Yes, a particular building on my bucket list is the Burj Khalifa in Dubai because I want to see the world's tallest tower and its observation deck. Although it seems expensive, I hope I can visit it someday.

提案: Make a clear, direct preference statement then give one or two specific reasons. Avoid contradictory or cluttered phrasing ("I want to live in a tall building but... I prefer..."). Choose one stance and explain using linking words like "however" or "so."

例: I wouldn't choose a tall skyscraper; I prefer a low-rise, two-story house because it feels more homely and quieter. For example, a small house with a garden would suit my lifestyle better than a busy high-rise.

× There are no tall buildings near my home because I live in the outskirts.

✓ There are no tall buildings near my home because I live on the outskirts.

Use the preposition 'on' with 'the outskirts' to indicate location. 'In the outskirts' is nonstandard; say 'on the outskirts' to be grammatically correct.

× My place is surrounded by trees and farm lands.

✓ My place is surrounded by trees and farmland.

Use the uncountable noun 'farmland' rather than the two-word plural 'farm lands'. 'Farmland' correctly refers to agricultural land in general.

× I live in Antico, that's why there is no tall buildings around here.

✓ I live in Antico; that's why there are no tall buildings around here.

The verb 'to be' must agree with the plural noun 'buildings'. Use 'there are' not 'there is'. Also replace the comma with a semicolon or split into two sentences for clarity.

× Of course, I love taking photos of the buildings.

✓ Of course, I love taking photos of buildings.

Omit the definite article 'the' when speaking generally about a class of objects. 'Photos of buildings' refers to buildings in general.

× It's really, really nice and amazing because back in my hometown, I live on the outskirts, surrounded by trees and farmland.

✓ It's really nice and amazing because back in my hometown I lived on the outskirts, surrounded by trees and farmland.

Maintain consistent past reference when talking about 'back in my hometown' by using past tense 'lived'. Also reduce redundant adverbs; 'really, really' is informal repetition.

× Of course, there is one particle building that is in my bucket list.

✓ Of course, there is one particular building on my bucket list.

Use 'particular' (not 'particle') to mean a specific one, and say 'on my bucket list' rather than 'in my bucket list'. Also use 'building' without extra articles.

× I know that it's like an impossible dream, but who knows, maybe one day I can visit it.

✓ I know it's kind of an impossible dream, but who knows, maybe one day I could visit it.

For hypothetical future possibility, 'could' is more appropriate than 'can' to convey uncertainty. Also 'like' as a filler is informal; 'kind of' or 'a bit' is clearer.

× I want to live in a tall building but honestly I prefer to live in a low rise building or just a two-story building.

✓ I want to live in a tall building, but honestly I prefer to live in a low-rise building or just a two-story house.

Add a comma before the conjunction 'but'. Hyphenate 'low-rise' as a compound adjective and use 'house' for 'two-story' to be natural: 'two-story house'.

× I am already happy with a simple house and homey rather than a tall high rise skyscraper.

✓ I am already happy with a simple, homely house rather than a tall skyscraper.

Use 'homely' as the adjective form, not 'homey' after 'and'. Remove redundancy: 'tall high-rise skyscraper' is repetitive; 'tall skyscraper' suffices. Use commas to separate adjectives.