Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and frequency), avoid filler words and repetition, and give one or two specific reasons or contexts with linking words. Keep it under five sentences.

例: No, I don't walk a lot. I usually walk only twice a week when I have free time because I have a busy work schedule. For example, I walk in the neighborhood on weekends to relax and get some exercise.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence and organize supporting details with linking words. Reduce fillers, repeat fewer ideas, and give a specific example or memory to enrich your answer.

例: Yes, I often went for walks as a child because I lived in a village with many paths. For example, my friends and I would walk to the river every weekend to swim and play, which helped us explore the area and stay active.

提案: Be clearer and use correct vocabulary. Begin with a general statement then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, also). Avoid vague phrases and incomplete sentences.

例: People, especially city residents, like to walk in parks because parks provide green space and fresh air in urban areas. Also, parks often have playgrounds and entertainment facilities, which makes them convenient places for families with children.

提案: This answer is good but can be more concise and vivid. Use one clear topic sentence, link reasons with 'because' or 'so', and add a specific image or activity to make it memorable.

例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in the mountains because I love hiking and solitude. I would explore trails and small caves, enjoy panoramic views, and take photos of the scenery.

提案: Answer directly and organize information: state the place, say why you like it, and give a brief specific detail. Remove hesitations and correct minor grammar (e.g., 'we don't go frequently').

例: Lately I went for a walk on the Boulevard near my home. I prefer it because it has a long path by the sea where I can cycle with my children, and the seaside views make it a pleasant place to relax.

× Oh no, I understand the sense of the question.

✓ Oh no, I didn't understand the sense of the question.

The original sentence uses present tense 'understand' but context indicates the student is reacting to the examiner's question about walking; the speaker meant they did not understand the question at the time. This is a sentence structure and tense issue. Use past tense 'didn't understand' to express lack of understanding at that moment; keep subject-auxiliary order for negation with did not + base verb.'

× So I I thought that to to work and not work.

✓ So I thought that walking was part of work and not work.

The original has repetition and unclear structure. Reformulate to clarify meaning: use past tense 'thought' and a gerund 'walking' to express the idea. This corrects sentence structure and uses verb+ -ing appropriately (related to type 8/26). Use a concise clause 'walking was part of work and not work' to convey the intended contrast.'

× Umm, no I don't.

✓ Umm, no, I don't usually.

Alone this short answer is acceptable but adding 'usually' clarifies frequency. Commas improve readability. This addresses sentence completeness and clarity (type 26).

× It happens sometimes twice a week when I have free time especially I don't have much free time, that's why so I don't go anywhere.

✓ It happens sometimes, about twice a week, when I have free time; however, I don't have much free time, so I don't go anywhere often.

The original mixes clauses without proper connectors and punctuation. Use present simple 'happens' correctly but add adverbs and connectors: 'about twice a week' and 'however'/'so' to show contrast. Place frequency adverb 'often' in correct position. This fixes sentence structure and adverb placement (types 6 and 20/26).

× Uh, yes, I did, umm, I walked a lot with my friends alone.

✓ Uh, yes, I did. I walked a lot with my friends when I was a child.

The student needs to link the action to childhood as the examiner asked about childhood. Use past simple 'walked' correctly and add 'when I was a child' to specify time. Splitting into two sentences improves clarity (type 5/26).

× I lived in the village, that's why.

✓ I lived in a village, so that is why I walked a lot.

Use article 'a' with 'village' (article error, type 22) and connect cause and effect with 'so that is why'. This makes the sentence complete and grammatically correct (types 22 and 26).

× So I had a lot of uh, walking paths and umm, you know, with my neighbors and with my friends.

✓ So I had a lot of walking paths nearby and I often walked with my neighbors and my friends.

Replace vague prepositional phrasing with 'nearby' and use 'walked with' to show companionship. 'With my neighbors and with my friends' is repetitive; simplify to 'with my neighbors and my friends'. This corrects preposition and redundancy issues (type 11).

× We went, uh, for swimming, uh, we walked a lot and uh.

✓ We went swimming, and we walked a lot.

Use the correct verb pattern 'went swimming' (not 'went for swimming') and connect clauses with 'and'. Removing filler words makes the sentence grammatical and clear (type 26 and 8).

× Mostly people who live in cities and towns they do because they don't have any other variants, that's why so they go in the parks.

✓ Mostly, people who live in cities and towns do, because they don't have many other options, so they go to parks.

Replace 'any other variants' with 'many other options' (quantifier and word choice). Remove redundant subject 'they' after the clause and use 'go to parks' (correct preposition). This addresses quantifier, redundancy, and preposition errors (types 14, 26, 11).

× Another reason why they go to the party that so there are some entertainment places also, and with children it's too easy to.

✓ Another reason is that there are entertainment facilities, and it's easy with children to enjoy parks.

'Go to the party' is incorrect; intended meaning is 'go to the park'. Use 'is that' to introduce a reason. Replace 'entertainment places' with 'entertainment facilities' and rephrase the child clause for clarity. This corrects preposition and sentence structure errors (types 11 and 26).

× If I had the chance, I would probably go to the mountains. I would go hiking alone and not with anybody else.

✓ If I had the chance, I would probably go to the mountains and hike alone, not with anyone else.

Combine clauses for natural flow and replace 'anybody' with 'anyone' (pronoun choice). Use parallel structure 'go to the mountains and hike' to avoid repetition. This addresses pronoun and sentence structure issues (type 12 and 26).

× It would be a great pleasure to to see different places to explore the places or maybe some caves or somewhere.

✓ It would be a great pleasure to see different places, to explore caves, or other interesting sites.

Remove repeated 'to' and use infinitive 'to see' correctly. Use parallel infinitive phrases 'to see' and 'to explore' for clarity. This fixes the verb form and repetition (type 8/26).

× Where did you go for a walk lately?

✓ Where have you gone for a walk lately?

The examiner's question uses 'lately' (a recent time period), so present perfect 'have gone' is more appropriate than simple past 'did go'. This explains tense choice (type 5/7 note).

× Uh, I live in Georgia in, but to me we have Blvd. and Six Bay Park, both of them.

✓ Uh, I live in Georgia, and we have Boulevard and Six Bay Park here.

Remove the stray 'in' and reorganize to a clear sentence: 'I live in Georgia, and we have...' This fixes sentence structure and removes filler (type 26).

× But uh, still I like going to the Boulevard because it is a long path and I like uh, cycling there with my children.

✓ But I still like going to the boulevard because it is a long path, and I like cycling there with my children.

Minor punctuation and capitalization: 'boulevard' should be lowercase unless it's a proper name; add commas for clarity. 'Cycling there with my children' is correct prepositional use. This addresses punctuation and article/capitalization issues (types 22 and 11).

× We not quite frequently go and it is also located nearby the beach nearby the sea.

✓ We don't go very frequently, and it is located near the beach.

Use correct negation 'don't' with adverb 'very frequently'. Replace 'nearby the beach nearby the sea' with 'near the beach' to avoid repetition. This corrects adverb placement, negation, and preposition use (types 20, 26, 11).