Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, correct minor grammar and add linking words for coherence. Also avoid redundancy and keep within 3–4 sentences. Mention frequency and purpose specifically.

例: Yes, I walk a lot, especially early in the morning. I usually walk about two kilometers to clear my head before work, and then I go home and take a shower. This routine helps me feel more focused during the day.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence about childhood habits, then contrast with the present using clear linking words. Avoid unrealistic or vague claims and fix grammar (e.g., 'walked' instead of 'go'). Provide a reason for the change if possible.

例: Yes, I often walked outside when I was a child and could easily walk about two kilometers. However, nowadays I have some pain and can only manage short distances, so I don’t walk as far as before.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to structure reasons (e.g., 'Firstly', 'Moreover'). Improve grammar and vocabulary (comfortable, peaceful) and be slightly more specific with examples.

例: People like walking in parks because they are comfortable and peaceful. Firstly, parks are quieter than busy streets, and secondly, they offer chances to meet others or enjoy fresh air and greenery.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence and avoid filler words ('then', 'the our'). Use linking words to add supporting details and be specific about the facilities. Keep sentences concise and correct tense consistency.

例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in the nearest park because it has long paths, exercise stations, and is usually not crowded. I prefer going early in the morning when the air is fresh.

提案: Use past tense for 'lately' or say 'recently' with present perfect. Be specific about frequency and activities, correct grammar and awkward phrases ('spend sometimes'). Limit to 2–3 clear sentences and add linking words like 'usually' or 'often'.

例: Recently I have been going to the nearest park, especially on Saturday mornings. I usually go with my family to relax, play games, and spend time together.

× I work for about 2 kilometers to clear my head before going to work and once I'm done I go home take a shower.

✓ I walk for about 2 kilometers to clear my head before going to work, and once I'm done I go home and take a shower.

The sentence uses 'work' incorrectly where 'walk' is intended (word choice error) and misses the conjunction 'and' before 'take a shower'. This fits 'Verb in the present participle form' because the verbs in sequence need correct base forms and linking. Suggestion: use the correct verb 'walk' to match the activity and include 'and' to join two actions: 'go home and take a shower.'

× Did you often go outside to have a walk when you were a child?

✓ Did you often go outside to take a walk when you were a child?

The phrasing 'have a walk' is nonstandard in this context; 'take a walk' is the correct collocation in English. The question uses past tense 'did' and 'were', so keep past forms. Suggestion: replace 'have a walk' with 'take a walk.'

× I used to go outside for walking for about two kilometers without feeling any pain.

✓ I used to walk outside for about two kilometers without feeling any pain.

Using 'used to' requires the base verb form 'walk' rather than 'walking'. 'For walking' is incorrect; use 'to walk' or simply 'walk'. Suggestion: say 'I used to walk outside for about two kilometers...'.

× However, these days I can walk for 10 meters and then start to feel pain.

✓ However, these days I can only walk about 10 meters before I start to feel pain.

Use 'only' to indicate limitation and 'before I start' is more natural than 'and then start'. Also 'about 10 meters' is more idiomatic than 'for 10 meters' here. Suggestion: 'I can only walk about 10 meters before I start to feel pain.'

× I think because walking in a park feel better, comfy and safe, and because when you walk in a park usually the noise will be less, you can see other people, you can meet them there and have fun.

✓ I think walking in a park feels better, is comfortable and safe, and usually there is less noise; you can see other people, meet them and have fun.

Subject-verb agreement: 'walking... feel' should be 'walking... feels' because 'walking' is a singular gerund subject. 'Comfy' is informal; use 'comfortable' as an adjective and include 'is' to link it. 'The noise will be less' is awkward; use 'there is less noise'. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement with gerunds and use appropriate adjectives ('comfortable').

× If I had the chance, then I would go to the our nearest park because it is very long, it has so many facilities to practice and it is less crowded.

✓ If I had the chance, I would go to our nearest park because it is large, has many facilities for exercise, and is not very crowded.

Remove the extra article 'the' before 'our nearest park' (incorrect use of articles/pronouns) and improve word choice: 'very long' is odd for a park, use 'large' or 'spacious'. 'Facilities to practice' should be 'facilities for exercise'. Also simplify conditional by removing redundant 'then'. Suggestion: delete 'the' before 'our' and use clearer nouns/phrases.

× I would usually go there early in the morning.

✓ I usually go there early in the morning.

In a conditional hypothetical 'If I had the chance, I would go...' followed by 'I would usually go' is inconsistent. If speaking about habitual action in real life, use present 'I usually go'. If describing what would happen, 'I would go there early in the morning' is fine without 'usually'. Suggestion: choose either real habitual present ('I usually go') or hypothetical future ('I would go there early in the morning').

× Where did you go for a walk lately?

✓ Where did you go for a walk recently?

'Lately' is typically used with present perfect tense, not with simple past 'did'. Use 'recently' with past simple. Suggestion: replace 'lately' with 'recently' for past simple questions, or change to 'Have you gone for a walk lately?' if keeping 'lately.'

× Lately I go to our nearest park, especially early in the morning of Saturday.

✓ Lately I have been going to our nearest park, especially early on Saturday mornings.

'Lately' pairs with present perfect progressive ('have been going') rather than simple present 'go'. 'Early in the morning of Saturday' is unnatural; use 'early on Saturday mornings' to indicate habitual timing. Suggestion: use 'have been going' and pluralize to 'Saturday mornings.'

× I go with my family to have fun and spend sometimes.

✓ I go with my family to have fun and to spend time together sometimes.

'Spend sometimes' is ungrammatical; the correct phrase is 'spend time' and 'sometimes' should be placed appropriately. Also add 'together' for clarity. Suggestion: use 'spend time together sometimes' or 'sometimes we spend time together.'