Reading— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more fluent and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, reduce hesitations, correct tense and phrasing, and add one specific detail to make the answer natural and informative. Use linking words if you add details.

例: Yes, I enjoy reading, especially manga and comics. I’ve read them since I was a child because my favorite magazine published new chapters every week, and that habit helped me relax after school.

提案: Organize the answer: open with a clear topic sentence, then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, however). Remove filler words and correct small errors (e.g., “their scent” → “the scent”).

例: It depends on the situation. For example, I prefer reading on a screen during my long commute because e-books are convenient and lightweight. However, at home I prefer paper books because I enjoy the feel and smell of the pages.

提案: Start with a direct topic sentence, then give clear contrasting examples using linking words (for instance, whereas). Avoid repeated fillers and use precise vocabulary (e.g., “academic papers” not “academic paper for studies at schools”).

例: You should read carefully when working on academic papers or business documents because accuracy and responsibility matter. In contrast, when reading for pleasure, such as enjoying manga, a quick or relaxed read is usually fine.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and concise reasons with linking phrases (for example, because/since). Reduce repetitions and correct grammar (e.g., “I need only to get important points” or “I only need the main points”). Add one specific example of when scanning helps.

例: I prefer scanning rather than detailed reading because I’m very busy with university work and a part-time job. For example, when researching for an assignment on the train, I scan articles to find main ideas and save the detailed reading for when I have more time.

× I'm, I've been used to, uh, read manga, uh, from when I was little 'cause my favorite magazine had manga.

✓ I'm used to reading manga from when I was little because my favorite magazine had manga.

The phrase 'used to' meaning 'accustomed to' should be followed by a gerund (verb+ing). The original mixes present perfect 'I've been' with 'used to' and the base verb 'read', causing incorrect form and redundancy. Use 'I'm used to reading' or 'I've been used to reading'. Suggestion: choose one form and follow it with a gerund: 'I'm used to reading' or 'I've been used to reading'.

× But at home I definitely uh read paper ones because they their scent is good.

✓ But at home I definitely read paper ones because their scent is good.

The original contains a redundant pronoun 'they' before 'their', creating an error. Remove the extra 'they'. Also keep simple past/present distinction consistent; 'read' (present) is fine in this context. Suggestion: avoid inserting extra pronouns; proofread for repetition.

× I think we have to read books or papers carefully when we are working on like our academic paper for studies at schools or like business tasks because we have a a responsibility to do those things compared to like reading manga as our hobbies.

✓ I think we have to read books or papers carefully when we are working on our academic papers for school or on business tasks because we have a responsibility to do those things, unlike reading manga as a hobby.

The original is wordy and contains filler words ('like', repeated 'a') and unclear parallel structure. 'Academic paper' should be plural 'academic papers' to match general meaning or use 'an academic paper'. 'For studies at schools' is awkward; use 'for school'. 'Compared to like reading manga as our hobbies' is ungrammatical and unclear; 'unlike reading manga as a hobby' is concise. Suggestion: remove filler words, fix plurality, and use clear contrast words (unlike) for better structure.

× So, uh, I need only, umm, getting some important points.

✓ So I only need to get some important points.

After the verb 'need' in this context, the infinitive 'to get' is required, not the gerund 'getting'. Also order of 'only' is adjusted for naturalness. Suggestion: use 'need to' + base verb for required actions: 'need to get'.

× Well actually it depends on the situation. Umm, for for example, umm, I always commute to my university which is located a bit far from my home. Then on the train to get there I prefer to read electronic ones.

✓ Well, actually it depends on the situation. For example, I always commute to my university, which is a bit far from my home. On the train I prefer to read electronic versions.

Original has repetition ('for for example'), unnecessary filler, and awkward phrasing 'to get there'. 'Electronic ones' is vague; 'electronic versions' or 'digital books' is clearer. Also commas improve clause separation. Suggestion: remove filler, fix repetitions, and use clearer nouns ('electronic versions' or 'digital ones').