Rules— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and lacks coherence. Try to structure your response with a clear topic sentence and supporting details, avoid redundancy, and use linking words to connect ideas. Also, be careful with grammar and sentence completeness.

例: Yes, there are many rules at my school. For example, female students are required to wear a hijab, and we were not allowed to use cell phones during class to avoid distractions.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains many fillers, which affects fluency and coherence. Try to give a direct answer with clear reasons and examples, and avoid excessive hesitation. Use linking words to organize your ideas logically.

例: Definitely, I think more rules can help students develop better habits. For instance, rules about punctuality and respect can prepare students to be responsible adults in the future.

提案: Your answer is brief and lacks detail. Try to provide more specific information about why the teacher was good, and use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, I had a math teacher who was excellent at his job. He explained difficult concepts clearly, which helped many students achieve good grades in his lessons.

× Yes there are a lot of rules in our schools and when I was a student we had a lot of rules like wearing hijab for girls and when we were not allowed to have a cell phone for example to call our.

✓ Yes, there are a lot of rules in our school and when I was a student we had a lot of rules like wearing a hijab for girls and we were not allowed to have a cell phone, for example, to call our family.

The word 'schools' should be singular 'school' to match the context of one school. 'Hijab' is a singular noun and should be preceded by the article 'a'. The phrase 'when we were not allowed' is better as 'we were not allowed' to avoid redundancy. Also, the sentence was incomplete and unclear at the end; adding 'family' clarifies the meaning.

× Definitely, I believe school is for umm students and umm, future of community. Umm, we need umm grow better students and better people for future then uh, we should uh, rules like uh, some rules learn.

✓ Definitely, I believe school is for students and the future of the community. We need to grow better students and better people for the future. Then, we should have some rules to learn.

The original sentence has multiple sentence structure errors and unclear phrasing. 'Umm' and 'uh' are fillers and should be removed for clarity. 'Future of community' needs the definite article 'the' and 'community' should be preceded by 'the'. 'We need umm grow' should be 'we need to grow'. The last part is unclear and corrected to 'we should have some rules to learn' to make sense.

× Yes, I had. He was my mathematic teacher and he was good at his job. Many students had very good grade, great in his lesson.

✓ Yes, I did. He was my math teacher and he was good at his job. Many students had very good grades and were great in his lessons.

The phrase 'Yes, I had' is incorrect; it should be 'Yes, I did' to answer the question properly. 'Mathematic teacher' should be 'math teacher' as the common term. 'Grade' should be plural 'grades' because 'many students' implies multiple grades. 'Great in his lesson' should be 'were great in his lessons' to agree in number and tense.