Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to respond directly with a clear topic sentence, avoid redundancy, and use correct grammar. For example, say "I don't like singing because I believe I don't have a good singing voice."

例: I don't like singing because I believe I don't have a good singing voice, and I feel uncomfortable when I try to sing in front of others.

提案: Your answer is confusing and lacks coherence. Provide a clear topic sentence and use linking words to explain your reasons. For example, "No, I have never learned to sing because I am not confident in my singing skills, and I prefer to listen to music rather than sing."

例: No, I have never learned to sing because I am not confident in my singing skills. Instead, I enjoy listening to music in my free time.

提案: Your answer is repetitive and unclear. Try to give a direct response with supporting details using correct grammar. For example, "In the future, I would like to sing for my loved ones, especially my husband, because I want to express my love for him."

例: In the future, I would like to sing for my loved ones, especially my husband, to show how much I love and appreciate him.

提案: Your answer is relevant but contains some grammatical mistakes and redundancy. Use linking words to make your answer more coherent. For example, "Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness because when I listen to music, it relieves my stress and distracts me from personal problems."

例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because when I listen to music, it helps me relax and forget about my worries for a while.

× I do not prefer to say because I don't think my I have forfeit voice to become a singer or to sing.

✓ I do not prefer to say because I don't think I have the voice to become a singer or to sing.

The sentence contains an incorrect pronoun usage with 'my I' which is redundant and confusing. The correct pronoun is 'I' without 'my'. Also, 'forfeit voice' is incorrect; it should be 'the voice'. Removing 'my' before 'I' and adding 'the' before 'voice' corrects the sentence.

× I personally believe that I do not have a melody's voice which effects singing very much.

✓ I personally believe that I do not have a melodic voice which affects singing very much.

The adjective 'melody's' is incorrect; the correct adjective form is 'melodic'. Also, 'effects' is a noun; the verb form 'affects' should be used here to indicate influence.

× No, as I only I said that I am not confident in my singing skills so I never even tried to learn to sing because in public I usually avoid to say enough love to listen to music very much.

✓ No, as I said, I am not confident in my singing skills so I have never even tried to learn to sing because in public I usually avoid saying I love to listen to music very much.

The phrase 'I only I said' is redundant; 'I said' suffices. 'Never even tried' should be in present perfect 'have never even tried' to indicate experience up to now. 'Avoid to say' is incorrect; the correct form is 'avoid saying'. The sentence structure is improved for clarity.

× because in public I usually avoid to say enough love to listen to music very much.

✓ because in public I usually avoid saying I love to listen to music very much.

The verb 'avoid' should be followed by a gerund ('saying'), not an infinitive ('to say'). This correction fixes the preposition usage.

× If it were in future I will say I would like to sing only for my loved ones, specially my husband because I would because I love him very much and you too love I would.

✓ If it were in the future, I would say I would like to sing only for my loved ones, especially my husband because I love him very much.

The phrase 'If it were in future' should be 'If it were in the future' to be grammatically correct. The sentence mixes conditional and future tenses incorrectly; 'I will say' should be 'I would say' to match the subjunctive mood. 'Specially' is a misspelling of 'especially'. The phrase 'and you too love I would' is unclear and removed for clarity.

× And I love love. I would be sending for him.

✓ And I love him. I would be singing for him.

The phrase 'I love love' is unclear and likely a mistake; it should be 'I love him'. 'Sending' is incorrect in this context; the correct verb is 'singing'.

× Yes, I truly believe that singing can bring happiness to people because even when I listen to music I become very happy It it gets much, it gets all of my stress away from my mind and even divert me for some time from my personal things.

✓ Yes, I truly believe that singing can bring happiness to people because even when I listen to music, I become very happy. It helps a lot; it takes all of my stress away from my mind and even diverts me for some time from my personal problems.

The original sentence is a run-on with unclear phrases like 'It it gets much'. It is corrected by splitting into clearer sentences and using appropriate verbs: 'helps', 'takes', and 'diverts'. 'Personal things' is vague; 'personal problems' is more appropriate.