Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: ควรปรับปรุงโครงสร้างประโยคให้ชัดเจนและถูกต้องมากขึ้น ใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อเชื่อมโยงความคิดอย่างเป็นธรรมชาติ และหลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำซ้ำหรือผิดไวยากรณ์ เช่น 'get expressed' ควรเป็น 'express' และเพิ่มรายละเอียดที่ชัดเจนขึ้นเกี่ยวกับความรู้สึกเมื่อร้องเพลง

例: Yes, I like singing because it allows me to express my emotions and feel relaxed. Moreover, singing helps me connect deeply with the music and enjoy myself. It is truly a fun and enjoyable activity that brightens my mood.

提案: ควรใช้ประโยคที่ชัดเจนและถูกต้องทางไวยากรณ์ เช่น 'grid' ควรเป็น 'grade' และ 'say' ควรเป็น 'sing' รวมถึงใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อให้ประโยคลื่นไหลและมีความหมายครบถ้วน ควรอธิบายเพิ่มเติมเกี่ยวกับประสบการณ์การเรียนร้องเพลงและการฝึกฝนด้วย

例: Yes, I learned how to sing when I was in grade 5 or 6. Although I haven't taken formal lessons since then, I practice singing by myself during my free time to improve my skills.

提案: ควรปรับปรุงการใช้ประโยคให้สมบูรณ์และลื่นไหล ใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อเชื่อมโยงความคิด และหลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำซ้ำหรือคำที่ไม่ถูกต้อง เช่น 'exert' ควรเป็น 'express' และเพิ่มรายละเอียดเพื่ออธิบายเหตุผลให้ชัดเจนขึ้น

例: I prefer to sing for myself, especially when I am alone at home. It is an enjoyable time because I can fully express my feelings without any distractions. Singing alone helps me relax and have fun.

提案: ควรปรับปรุงการใช้คำและโครงสร้างประโยคให้ถูกต้องและชัดเจน เช่น 'connect a so' ควรเป็น 'connect us' และ 'filling' ควรเป็น 'feelings' รวมถึงใช้คำเชื่อมและอธิบายให้สมบูรณ์เพื่อสื่อความหมายได้ดีขึ้น

例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness because music is a universal language that connects us all. Even if the lyrics are in different languages, the rhythm and melody can evoke strong emotions and make people feel joyful.

× I enjoy listening to music and thinking along helps me feel more connected to the souls.

✓ I enjoy listening to music and thinking along helps me feel more connected to souls.

The word 'souls' should not have the definite article 'the' because it refers to souls in general, not specific souls. In English, when talking about things in general in plural, we usually omit 'the'.

× When I sing I get expressed my feelings and emotions which makes me feel relaxed and happy.

✓ When I sing, I express my feelings and emotions, which makes me feel relaxed and happy.

The phrase 'I get expressed my feelings' is incorrect. The correct structure is 'I express my feelings'. Also, commas are needed after 'When I sing' and before 'which' to separate clauses properly.

× Is a really fun and enjoyable activity for me.

✓ It is a really fun and enjoyable activity for me.

The sentence is missing the subject 'It'. Every sentence needs a subject and a verb to be complete.

× Yes I have learned how to sing when I was grid 5 or 6 and after that I didn't learn how to say anymore but I sing by myself and I have my free time an.

✓ Yes, I learned how to sing when I was in grade 5 or 6, and after that, I didn't learn how to sing anymore, but I sing by myself in my free time.

The past tense 'learned' is appropriate here. 'Grid' should be 'grade'. 'Say' is incorrect; it should be 'sing'. Also, 'I have my free time an' is incomplete and should be 'in my free time'. Commas are added for clarity.

× Yes, I've always practice my singing. Since then.

✓ Yes, I've always practiced my singing since then.

'Practice' should be in past participle form 'practiced' after 'have'. Also, 'Since then.' is a sentence fragment and should be connected to the previous sentence.

× I want to sing for myself. I like to sing when I am alone in my house because I it is the enjoyable time for me.

✓ I want to sing for myself. I like to sing when I am alone in my house because it is an enjoyable time for me.

The phrase 'I it is' is incorrect; 'I' should be removed. Also, 'the enjoyable time' should be 'an enjoyable time' because it is one of many enjoyable times.

× Like I can exert myself the most when I when I am alone. Is. Fun.

✓ I can express myself the most when I am alone. It is fun.

The sentence is fragmented and contains repetition. 'Exert' is incorrect here; 'express' is the correct verb. 'Is. Fun.' is a fragment and should be 'It is fun.'

× Yes, I believe the singing can bring happiness to people because music is a universal language that connect a so even if the RLC is are in different languages, we can still touch the filling from the rhythm an we can still evoke strong emotions for simple when I listen to a beautiful.

✓ Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because music is a universal language that connects us, so even if the lyrics are in different languages, we can still feel the feeling from the rhythm and we can still evoke strong emotions, for example, when I listen to a beautiful song.

Several plural and singular issues: 'singing' does not need 'the'; 'connect' should be 'connects' to agree with singular 'music'; 'a so' is incorrect, should be 'us'; 'RLC is are' should be 'lyrics are'; 'filling' should be 'feeling'; 'an' should be 'and'; sentence is incomplete and needs completion for clarity.