Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 你的回答表达了个人经历和感受，但语言不够自然，存在语法错误和表达不清晰的问题。建议简化句子结构，避免重复，使用正确的词汇表达，如'tone deaf'而非'tone deafness'，并注意句子连贯性。

例: No, I don't like singing because I am tone deaf. When I was in kindergarten, I sang in front of others, but someone laughed at me, which made me feel embarrassed and shy. Since then, I have avoided singing in public.

提案: 回答中有语法和表达错误，如'Are you my primary school?'不清楚意思。建议直接回答问题，使用正确的时态和表达，增加连贯性和具体细节。

例: Yes, I learned how to sing in primary school during music classes. Our teacher not only taught us singing techniques but also helped us appreciate the beauty of music.

提案: 回答表达了清晰的观点，但句子结构有些混乱，部分表达不自然。建议简化句子，使用连接词使表达更流畅，并注意时态一致。

例: I am not very good at singing, but if I had to sing for someone, I would choose my mom. Singing for her would be a special way to show my gratitude and love, and it could strengthen our relationship.

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不清晰的问题，如'Streisand'可能是拼写错误。建议使用简单明了的句子，清楚表达观点，并使用恰当的词汇。

例: Yes, I think singing can bring happiness because it helps people reduce stress and express their true feelings. It is a good way to enjoy life and share positive emotions with others.

× I don't like saying because I'm a tone deafness and when I was very young about in kindergarten I sound in front of others in a public hall.

✓ I don't like singing because I'm tone deaf and when I was very young, about in kindergarten, I sang in front of others in a public hall.

这里'stone deafness'是不可数名词，不能用冠词'a'，应改为'tone deaf'。动词'sound'应为过去式'sang'，因为描述过去发生的动作。

× I sound in front of others in a public hall.

✓ I sang in front of others in a public hall.

描述过去发生的动作，动词应使用过去式，'sound'应改为'sang'。

× But someone laughed and me that made me feel really embarrassed and shy, so assistant I refused to sing.

✓ But someone laughed at me, and that made me feel really embarrassed and shy, so afterwards I refused to sing.

'laughed and me'应为'laughed at me'，介词'at'缺失。'assistant'应为'adverb'，这里应使用'adverb' 'afterwards'表示时间顺序。

× Are you my primary school?

✓ When I was in primary school?

原句结构错误，疑问句应表达时间，改为'When I was in primary school?'更符合语境。

× My hand music class and our music teacher not only taught us how to sing, but also they taught us how to enjoy the beauty of the music.

✓ In my primary school music class, our music teacher not only taught us how to sing, but also how to enjoy the beauty of music.

'My hand music class'不合适，应为'In my primary school music class'。'the music'前的定冠词不必要，改为'music'。

× Well, I did I mention events.

✓ Well, I did mention events.

多余的'I'导致句子结构错误，应删除。

× But if someone asked me to sing for somebody, I will choose to sing for my mom because I think it will be a special way to show my gratitude and love for her and it can make our relationship closer.

✓ But if someone asked me to sing for somebody, I would choose to sing for my mom because I think it would be a special way to show my gratitude and love for her and it can make our relationship closer.

条件句中虚拟语气，主句应使用'would'而非'will'。

× Yes, I think so because I think think I reduced the Streisand make people feel true.

✓ Yes, I think so because I think singing reduces stress and makes people feel true.

'think think'重复，应删除。'reduced'时态错误，应为一般现在时'reduces'。'Streisand'应为'stress'。

× It's a good way for people to. Enjoy the beauty of life and she'll good emotion with others.

✓ It's a good way for people to enjoy the beauty of life and share good emotions with others.

句子断裂，'to.'后不应断句。'she'll'应为'share'。