History— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be more precise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid vague words like "epic," and add one brief specific detail using a linking word. Keep it under five sentences.

Ejemplo: Yes. In middle school I studied both Chinese and European history, and I particularly remember lessons on ancient Rome because we studied Roman law and architecture, which I found fascinating.

Sugerencia: Good clear answer and structure. Improve by replacing casual fillers ("Well") with a direct topic sentence, add one specific example of a channel or type of video and a linking phrase to explain why you use videos.

Ejemplo: As a graduate student I usually learn history through online videos, mainly on YouTube and Bilibili; for example, I follow documentary channels and lecture series because they present complex topics visually and concisely.

Sugerencia: Avoid repetition and unclear phrasing. Give a concise topic sentence, then one specific benefit with a reason and clearer wording. Avoid generalizations and awkward phrasing like "Asian people" unless relevant; use linking words to connect ideas.

Ejemplo: One major benefit of learning history is that it helps us understand past mistakes so we can avoid repeating them; for instance, studying economic policies from past recessions can guide better decisions today.

Sugerencia: This answer is unclear and contains grammar errors. Start with a direct opinion, then support it with a clear reason using linking words. Keep sentences simple and specific.

Ejemplo: Yes, I think history is important because it records how people behaved in the past, which helps us predict consequences and make better decisions in the present.

× Well, as a graduate student I don't have a history class, so I learn history mainly from these video websites such as YouTube and Bilibili.

✓ Well, as a graduate student I don't have a history class, so I learn history mainly from video websites such as YouTube and Bilibili.

The article 'these' before 'video websites' is unnecessary; 'video websites' is a general category and should be used without a demonstrative article. Use 'video websites' to refer to the general platforms. Suggestion: use 'video websites' or 'online video sites'.

× Wells, there are countless advantages of learning history.

✓ Well, there are countless advantages to learning history.

The phrase 'advantages of learning' is not incorrect but 'advantages to learning' is more idiomatic when followed by a gerund. Also 'Wells' is a typo for 'Well'. Suggestion: use 'Well, there are countless advantages to learning history.'

× I will list one advantage. People can learn history and learn previous mistakes made by Asian people and avoid getting to the same path.

✓ I will list one advantage. People can learn history, learn from past mistakes made by Asian people, and avoid going down the same path.

Several preposition and verb choice issues: 'learn previous mistakes' should be 'learn from past mistakes' (use preposition 'from' and 'past' for time reference). 'Avoid getting to the same path' is ungrammatical; use 'avoid going down the same path.' Suggestion: use 'learn from past mistakes' and 'avoid going down the same path.'

× Yet since history recorded record the ancient people activities, we will not know the future if we don't study history seriously.

✓ However, because history records the activities of ancient people, we will not know the future if we don't study history seriously.

Multiple errors: 'Yet' is awkward as a sentence starter here; 'However' or 'Because' is better. 'history recorded record' duplicates and mixes tenses; correct form is present simple 'history records' to express a general truth. 'the ancient people activities' has word order and article problems; correct is 'the activities of ancient people.' Suggestion: use present simple for general truths and correct noun phrase order: 'history records the activities of ancient people.'