网络— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 回答は意味が通じますが、文法ミスや冗長さがあります。具体的には冠詞や時制、語順の誤り（"a junior high school student" や "I used the Internet on my phone"）を直し、簡潔なトピックセンテンスの後に短い補足を入れてください。例：始めた時期→理由→デバイスの順で。接続詞を使って流れを良くしましょう。

範例: I started using the Internet when I was a junior high school student because my parents gave me a cell phone. After that, I mainly accessed the Internet on my phone to check messages and look up information.

建議: 意味は伝わりますが、文が長く繋がりすぎて不自然です。まず主文で頻度を明示し（"I go online every day"）、次に理由を短い補足文で述べ、接続詞（because, so）を適切に使って整理してください。また時制や語順（"my friends live"、"I live far from Tokyo"）を正してください。

範例: I go online every day. Since my friends live in Tokyo and I live far from them, we can't meet often, so we keep in touch through social media.

建議: 文法と語順のミスが多く、意味が取りにくいです。まず肯定で短く答え（"Yes"）し、その後にいつ・なぜ使えなかったかを明確に述べてください。不要な語（"shouldn't"）を省き、正しい表現（"my parents didn't allow me to use a cell phone"）を使いましょう。

範例: Yes. I couldn't use the Internet when I was in elementary school because my parents didn't allow me to have a cell phone at that time.

建議: 繰り返しが多く、時制と表現を整理する必要があります。まず現在の意見を明確に述べ（"Yes, I think I spend too much time online"）、次に具体的な根拠（スクリーンタイムの数字）を付け加え、最後に短い結論を加えてください。また"every day"や"7 or 8 hours"の自然な言い方に直しましょう。

範例: Yes, I think I spend too much time online. My phone's screen time shows about seven to eight hours a day, which I feel is excessive, so I'm trying to reduce it.

建議: 表現が冗長で論理がやや不明確です。まず直接に意見を述べ（"I couldn't live without the Internet"）、次に理由を一つか二つの明確な文で説明してください。重複表現（"on Internet on the Internet"）を避け、具体例（communicating, finding information）を挙げると説得力が増します。

範例: I don't think I could live without the Internet. I rely on it to communicate with friends and to find information for my studies, so it would be very difficult to manage daily life without it.

× I use cell phone every day because my friends living in Tokyo but I'm living from far to Tokyo so we couldn't meet each other every day so we talk on SNS everyday.

✓ I use my cell phone every day because my friends live in Tokyo but I live far from Tokyo, so we can't meet each other every day and we talk on SNS every day.

The sentence mixes tenses and has incorrect verb forms. 'friends living' should be 'friends live' (present simple for habitual state). 'I'm living from far to Tokyo' is incorrect preposition and progressive use; use 'I live far from Tokyo.' 'couldn't meet' conflicts with present habitual context; use 'can't meet.' Also add possessive 'my' and fix spacing and repetition. Suggestions: use present simple for habitual actions, use correct prepositions ('far from'), and include possessive determiners where needed.

× I started using the Internet when I was junior high school student and my parents gave me a cell phone and I used Internet in my phone.

✓ I started using the Internet when I was a junior high school student and my parents gave me a cell phone, and I used the Internet on my phone.

Missing article before 'junior high school student' (singular countable noun requires 'a'). 'used Internet' needs the definite article 'the Internet' or 'the Internet' and the preposition 'on my phone' is correct. Suggestion: add 'a' before singular countable nouns and use 'the Internet' and 'on' to indicate device.

× Yes, I couldn't use Internet when I was. Elementary school shouldn't because my parents didn't allow to me use cell phone.

✓ Yes, I couldn't use the Internet when I was in elementary school because my parents didn't allow me to use a cell phone.

Multiple errors: remove stray period after 'was', add 'in' before 'elementary school' to indicate time/place, use 'the Internet' and 'allow me to use' (verb pattern: allow + object + to-infinitive, not 'allow to me'). Also add article 'a' before 'cell phone'. Suggestion: learn correct verb patterns (allow someone to do something) and prepositions for school ('in elementary school').

× I think I spent too much time online because my phone screen time is everyday event 7 hours or 8 hours. I think it is too much time to use my cell phone so I think I spend too much time online.

✓ I think I spend too much time online because my phone screen time is usually seven or eight hours every day. I think that is too much time to use my cell phone, so I think I spend too much time online.

Tense inconsistency: 'spent' (past) should be 'spend' (present) to match current habit. 'everyday event 7 hours or 8 hours' is ungrammatical; use 'usually seven or eight hours every day.' Write numbers in words for small numbers in speech. Suggestion: keep present simple for habits, and use 'usually' or 'about' to express typical durations.

× I think I can't live without the Internet because when I met my friends, we talk about it on Internet on the Internet. So I think I can't live without Internet.

✓ I think I can't live without the Internet because when I meet my friends, we talk about it on the Internet. So I think I can't live without the Internet.

Mix of past 'met' and present 'talk'; use present 'meet' for habitual action. Use 'the Internet' consistently and remove duplicate 'on Internet on the Internet'. Suggestion: use present simple for general truths/habits and use definite article with 'Internet'.