自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Сфокусируйтесь на простых, грамматически правильных предложениях. Начните с чёткого топик предложения: когда у вас появился велосипед. Избегайте повторов («when I was when I was») и ошибок с артиклями и порядком слов (правильно: “when I was seven years old”, «my brother and mother bought me a bike»). Добавьте одну‑две конкретные детали с связкой (например, why it was special) и соблюдайте максимум 4–5 предложений.

範例: I had a bike when I was seven years old. My mother and brother bought me an orange bike as a birthday present, and it looked very beautiful. I remember feeling very happy because I could ride to my friends’ houses and feel more independent.

建議: Работайте над ясностью и связностью. Дайте чёткое мнение в первом предложении, затем поясните причину с использованием связочных слов (for example, because, so). Избегайте бессвязных фраз и ошибок лексики («didn't portrayed environment» непонятно) — используйте простые выражения: «good for health», «environmentally friendly», «cheap and convenient». Ограничьте ответ до 3–4 предложений с конкретными примерами.

範例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. Many people use bicycles because they are cheap, good for health, and environmentally friendly. For example, students and workers often ride bikes to avoid traffic and save money.

× it was when I was when I was in a seven years old

✓ It was when I was seven years old

The phrase 'a seven years old' mixes singular article with plural noun and an incorrect structure. Use the age expression 'I was seven years old' (no article, 'years' plural after the number). Suggestion: say 'I was seven years old' or 'when I was seven'.

× my brother and mother bought for me bike

✓ my brother and mother bought a bike for me

The verb 'buy' does not require 'for' before the object; the correct word order is 'bought a bike for me' or 'bought me a bike'. Also add the article 'a' before 'bike'. Suggestion: use 'bought me a bike' or 'bought a bike for me'.

× It was an orange color and you know, it was very beautiful

✓ It was orange in color, and it was very beautiful

Saying 'an orange color' is awkward here; 'orange in color' or simply 'it was orange' is natural. Also repeat subject to keep clarity: 'it was... and it was...'. Suggestion: 'It was orange and very beautiful.'

× I was very happy to this present

✓ I was very happy with this present

The correct preposition with 'happy' when referring to a gift is 'with' not 'to'. Use 'happy with' or 'happy about'. Suggestion: 'I was very happy with this present.'

× in our country in every places we can see a boy come

✓ in our country, in many places we can see boys riding bikes

'Every places' is incorrect; use 'many places' or 'every place'. Also 'a boy come' is ungrammatical for describing a common sight; use plural 'boys' and a verb phrase like 'riding bikes' or 'on bikes'. Suggestion: 'in many places we can see boys riding bikes.'

× because bike is like a a healthy and didn't portrayed environment

✓ because bikes are healthy and environmentally friendly

This sentence has multiple issues: 'bike' should be plural 'bikes' when speaking generally. 'Like a a healthy' is incorrect—use the adjective 'healthy'. 'Didn't portrayed environment' is ungrammatical; likely intended 'do not pollute the environment' or 'are environmentally friendly'. Suggestion: 'because bikes are healthy and do not pollute the environment.'

× and it's very like a popular comfortable and the good

✓ and they are very popular, comfortable, and good

'It's' should match plural 'bikes' so use 'they are'. Word order and articles are wrong: 'very like a popular comfortable and the good' should be a simple list of adjectives: 'very popular, comfortable, and good'. Suggestion: 'and they are very popular, comfortable, and convenient.'