自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and direct: start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No + brief detail), then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct grammar mistakes and avoid repetition (e.g., 'play my bikes'). Also fix the final clause which is unclear ('and my father'). Aim for 2–4 sentences total.

範例: Yes, I did. I loved riding my bike around the neighborhood with my friends, especially in the afternoons after school. However, as I got older I rode less often because I became busier with studies and other activities.

建議: Provide a clear topic sentence then two specific reasons linked with linking words (e.g., 'because', 'also'). Avoid redundancy and finish the thought (sentence ended abruptly). Use precise vocabulary (e.g., 'infrastructure', 'affordable petrol'). Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

範例: No, I don't think bikes are very popular in Qatar because the infrastructure is not bike-friendly — there are few bike lanes or sidewalks. Also, cars are relatively cheap and petrol is affordable, so most people prefer driving.

× Well, I believe that when I was a child, I was physically active.

✓ Well, I believe that when I was a child, I was physically active.

Sentence is correct; it uses past tense appropriately to describe childhood. No change needed.

× I loved to play sports.

✓ I loved to play sports.

Sentence correctly uses past tense 'loved' to describe past habits; no change required.

× I loved to play around, especially go outside.

✓ I loved to play around, especially to go outside.

Parallel structure requires matching forms: 'to play' and 'to go' or use both gerunds. Using 'to go' keeps infinitive form consistent with 'to play'. Alternatively, 'playing around, especially going outside' is acceptable.

× And one of those physical activities that I loved doing was also biking.

✓ And one of those physical activities I loved was biking.

Streamline wording and remove unnecessary 'doing' and 'also' for clarity. 'Loved was biking' correctly uses the gerund to name the activity.

× I love to go outside and play my bikes and play with my neighbors.

✓ I love to go outside and ride my bike and play with my neighbors.

'Play my bikes' is incorrect collocation. Use 'ride my bike' for bicycling. Also match singular/plural: 'bike' if referring to one, or 'bikes' if multiple; here 'my bike' fits. Additionally, tense consistency: the rest of answer is past, but this sentence uses present 'love' which should match context; depending on intended meaning, change to 'loved' if describing childhood.

× Though I when I got older, I stopped playing the bike and my father.

✓ However, when I got older, I stopped riding my bike, and my father did too.

Original is ungrammatical: misplaced 'though', wrong verb 'playing the bike', and unclear ending 'and my father'. Corrected sentence uses 'However' to contrast, 'riding my bike' for the activity, and clarifies that the father also stopped by adding 'did too'.

× Well, in my opinion, bikes aren't that popular in the country that I live in, which is Qatar, because mainly the roads around here, they don't really offer or have any spaces for bike riders.

✓ Well, in my opinion, bikes aren't very popular in the country I live in, Qatar, because the roads here don't really provide spaces for cyclists.

Avoid redundant pronouns 'the roads around here, they'; use concise noun 'roads here'. 'Offer or have any spaces' is wordy; 'provide spaces' is clearer. Use 'cyclists' instead of 'bike riders' for natural phrasing.

× Even for people that want to walk in the streets, there are no sidewalks for them.

✓ Even for people who want to walk in the streets, there are no sidewalks for them.

Use 'who' for people instead of 'that'. Alternatively, 'walk on the streets' or better 'walk along the streets' depending on nuance. Also could shorten to 'there are no sidewalks' without 'for them'.

× And at the same time, car and cars and gas, they're very cheap here in this country, so.

✓ And at the same time, cars and gasoline are very cheap here, so people tend to use cars more.

Original repeats 'car and cars and gas' and uses awkward pronoun placement. Use plural 'cars' and 'gasoline' (or 'fuel') as uncountable noun. Verb agreement: 'cars and gasoline are'. Complete the sentence by explaining consequence 'so people tend to use cars more'.