自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Make the answer more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid redundant phrases (e.g., “in the childhood”), and add one or two specific supporting details using a linking word. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I did. I had a red bicycle and often rode it with my friends around the neighborhood in the evenings. Because our neighborhood was quiet, we would race each other along the park path and sometimes stop to buy snacks from a corner shop.

建議: Be direct and use clearer grammar. Start with a short opinion sentence, then give specific reasons and a linking word. Remove filler words like “honestly” and correct grammar (e.g., "people who", "their personal vehicle").

範例: Yes, bikes are fairly popular in my country. Many people prefer them because they are cheaper to buy and maintain, and they are more convenient for short trips in congested cities. For example, students and delivery workers often use bikes to save time and money.

× Like most of the children in the childhood, I used to cycle around with my friends on the streets in the evening.

✓ Like most children in my childhood, I used to cycle around with my friends on the streets in the evening.

The phrase 'the children in the childhood' misuses the definite article and the noun phrase. In English we say 'like most children in my childhood' or simply 'like most children when I was a child.' Remove the unnecessary 'the' before 'children' and replace 'the childhood' with 'my childhood' to make the meaning clear and grammatically natural.

× Honestly, I would say that there are some people that who cannot afford cars and think that they are more expensive so they would prefer to have bikes as their. Personal vehicle.

✓ Honestly, I would say that there are some people who cannot afford cars and think that cars are too expensive, so they prefer to have bikes as their personal vehicles.

The original sentence has multiple issues: the relative clause uses both 'that' and 'who' (redundant), pronoun reference is unclear ('they are more expensive' lacks clear subject), unnecessary period splits the sentence, and 'personal vehicle' should agree in number with 'some people.' Use 'who' for people, specify 'cars' as the subject of 'are too expensive,' remove the extra period, and use 'vehicles' to match plural 'people.' This yields a clearer, grammatically correct sentence.