唱歌— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Try to make your answer more natural and concise. Avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. For example, instead of repeating 'whenever I feel', you can say 'whenever I feel low or stressed, I listen to music which helps me feel relaxed and happy.'

範例: Yes, I like singing because it has been my passion since childhood. Whenever I feel stressed or down, I listen to music, which helps me relax and feel joyful.

建議: Your answer is a bit repetitive and unclear. Try to organize your ideas logically and use linking words. Also, avoid redundancy like 'learned it from my own' twice. You can say, 'I have not taken formal lessons, but I learned singing mostly by myself and also from my school teacher.'

範例: I have not taken formal singing lessons, but I learned mostly by myself through daily practice. Additionally, my school teacher helped me improve my skills.

建議: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains unnecessary phrases. Try to express your feelings clearly and avoid vague expressions like 'they can do whatever I want.' Use linking words to connect your ideas. For example, 'I would love to sing for my friends because they support me during difficult times.'

範例: I would love to sing for my friends because they are very important to me and always support me when I am going through tough times.

建議: Your answer has some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Try to use correct grammar and clearer expressions. Use linking words to connect ideas. For example, 'Yes, I believe singing can bring joy and relieve stress because it uplifts one's mood.'

範例: Yes, I believe singing can bring happiness to people because it helps relieve stress and uplifts the mood.

× Yes I do like singing because it is one of my passion from the starting of my life and whenever I feel low or whenever I feel like stressed or depressed I used to listen music and can feel free and can feel 7th heaven.

✓ Yes I do like singing because it is one of my passions from the start of my life and whenever I feel low or stressed or depressed I listen to music and can feel free and can feel 7th heaven.

The word 'passion' should be plural 'passions' because it refers to one among many interests. 'From the starting of my life' is better expressed as 'from the start of my life'. 'Used to listen music' is incorrect; the correct form is 'listen to music' as 'listen' requires the preposition 'to'. Also, 'whenever I feel like stressed or depressed' is simplified to 'whenever I feel low or stressed or depressed' for clarity.

× No, I have not learned from anyone how to sing, but I have learned it from my own and from the every single day by singing every hour.

✓ No, I have not learned from anyone how to sing, but I have learned it on my own and every single day by singing every hour.

The phrase 'from my own' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'on my own'. Also, 'from the every single day' is incorrect; it should be 'every single day' without 'from the'.

× And I learned it basically from the schools there my teacher taught me, and by my own I learned it.

✓ I basically learned it at school where my teacher taught me, and I also learned it on my own.

The original sentence is awkward and unclear. 'From the schools there my teacher taught me' is better expressed as 'at school where my teacher taught me'. 'By my own' should be 'on my own'. The sentence is restructured for clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Who do you want to sing for?

✓ Whom do you want to sing for?

The correct object pronoun 'whom' should be used instead of 'who' because it is the object of the preposition 'for'.

× I would love to sing for my friends as they are my heart beat and they can do whatever I want and they can offer me anything in my lowest situation of my life.

✓ I would love to sing for my friends as they are my heartbeat and they can do whatever I want and they can offer me anything in the lowest moments of my life.

'Heart beat' should be one word 'heartbeat'. 'My lowest situation of my life' is awkward; 'the lowest moments of my life' is more natural. The sentence is corrected for clarity and natural expression.

× So if I ever get a chance to sing for someone, I would uh, sing for my friends.

✓ So if I ever get a chance to sing for someone, I would, uh, sing for my friends.

Added commas around 'uh' to indicate hesitation properly; no grammatical error but punctuation improves clarity.

× Yes I do think that by singing A1 can feels a joy and feel relief from any painful situation or any stressful situation because by singing one can have uplift his mood and can feel great.

✓ Yes, I do think that by singing one can feel joy and relief from any painful or stressful situation because singing can uplift one's mood and make one feel great.

'A1' is unclear and removed. 'Can feels' is incorrect; it should be 'can feel'. 'Feel relief' is correct but 'feel a joy' is incorrect; 'feel joy' is better. 'Have uplift his mood' is incorrect; it should be 'uplift one's mood'. The sentence is restructured for grammatical correctness and clarity.