唱歌— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 답변이 자연스럽지 않고 문법적 오류가 많으며, 의미 전달이 명확하지 않습니다. 문장을 간결하고 명확하게 구성하고, 주제에 직접적으로 답하는 문장으로 시작하세요. 또한, 'my boys'라는 표현이 문맥상 부적절하므로 정확한 단어 선택이 필요합니다.

範例: Yes, I like singing because it makes me feel happy and relaxed. Singing helps me express my emotions and enjoy myself.

建議: 문장이 불완전하고 문법 오류가 많아 의미 전달이 어렵습니다. 질문에 직접 답하고, 과거 경험과 꿈에 대해 명확하게 설명하세요. 문장을 완성하고, 연결어를 사용해 자연스럽게 이어가세요.

範例: No, I have never taken singing lessons, but I have loved singing since I was a child. I used to sing songs often, and my dream was to become a singer.

建議: 답변이 명확하지 않고, 'my boys'라는 표현이 반복되어 의미 전달이 어렵습니다. 질문에 직접 답하고, 청중에 대한 설명과 자신의 희망을 구체적으로 표현하세요.

範例: I want to sing for a large audience because I enjoy sharing my music with others. I hope my songs can touch people's hearts and make them feel happy.

建議: 문장이 불완전하고 의미 전달이 어렵습니다. 질문에 명확히 동의하거나 반대하며, 이유를 구체적으로 설명하세요. 문장을 완성하고, 감정을 표현하는 단어를 사용하세요.

範例: I absolutely agree that singing can bring happiness to people because music can evoke many emotions, such as joy and comfort, helping people feel better.

× Yes I do because when I'm singing I feel happy and my boy, I love my boys.

✓ Yes, I do because when I'm singing, I feel happy, and my boys, I love my boys.

The original sentence lacks commas to separate clauses and phrases, which affects clarity. Adding commas improves readability and sentence structure.

× So I loved listening to my boys, the singing in myself.

✓ So I love listening to my boys singing by myself.

The phrase 'the singing in myself' is incorrect. It should be 'singing by myself' to express that the student enjoys singing alone. Also, 'loved' should be 'love' to maintain present tense consistency.

× No, I never learned about how to sing but I love becau.

✓ No, I have never learned how to sing, but I love it.

The sentence is incomplete and uses 'learned' which is acceptable but 'have never learned' is more appropriate for experience up to now. Also, 'becau' is incomplete and should be removed or completed.

× But I love sing so when I was child I usually sing a song often and my dream was a singer.

✓ But I love to sing, so when I was a child, I usually sang songs often, and my dream was to be a singer.

'Love sing' should be 'love to sing'. 'When I was child' needs an article 'a child'. 'Usually sing' in past context should be 'usually sang'. 'My dream was a singer' should be 'my dream was to be a singer'.

× I wanna sing for many audience because I love my boys.

✓ I want to sing for many audiences because I love my boys.

'Audience' is a collective noun and usually used in singular form, but 'many audience' is incorrect; 'many audiences' or 'a large audience' is correct. Also, 'wanna' is informal; 'want to' is preferred.

× So many people hear my boys and they touched my boys.

✓ So many people hear my voice and they are touched by my voice.

'My boys' is incorrect; likely intended 'my voice'. Also, 'they touched my boys' is incorrect; should be 'they are touched by my voice' to express emotional impact.

× Absolutely agree because songs song can't recall the many sensations of feeling or sad and happiness because.

✓ I absolutely agree because songs can recall many sensations of feelings, both sad and happy.

The sentence is fragmented and contains errors: 'songs song' is redundant; 'can't recall' contradicts the intended meaning; 'the many sensations of feeling or sad and happiness' is awkward and unclear. Corrected to express that songs can evoke various emotions.