唱歌— Part 1 評分報告

建議: သင်၏အဖြေသည် သဘာဝကျပြီး ထိရောက်မှုရှိရန် ပိုမိုတိကျစွာ ဖော်ပြရန် လိုအပ်သည်။ "joyful atmosphere" ဆိုသောစကားလုံးကို သင်၏ခံစားချက်နှင့် ပိုမိုသက်ဆိုင်သော စကားလုံးဖြင့် ပြောင်းလဲသုံးပါ။ ထို့အပြင်၊ စကားလုံးများကို သေချာချိတ်ဆက်၍ စကားလုံးများအကြား ဆက်စပ်မှုရှိစေရန် ကြိုးစားပါ။

範例: I like singing because it helps me relax and lifts my mood instantly. Whenever I sing, I feel joyful and stress-free, which makes me very happy.

建議: အဖြေသည် မရှင်းလင်းသည့် စကားလုံးများနှင့် သဒ္ဒါမရှိမှုများကြောင့် နားလည်ရခက်ခဲသည်။ သင်၏အဖြေကို ပိုမိုရှင်းလင်းစွာ၊ တိကျစွာ ပြောဆိုရန် ကြိုးစားပါ။ သင် သင်ယူမှုရှိခြင်း သို့မဟုတ် မရှိခြင်းကို တိုက်ရိုက်ဖြေကြားပါ။

範例: No, I have never learned how to sing properly in a choir or professionally because I usually spend time with my friends and family instead.

建議: အဖြေသည် မရှင်းလင်းသည့် စကားလုံးများနှင့် သဒ္ဒါမရှိမှုများကြောင့် နားလည်ရခက်ခဲသည်။ သင် သီချင်းဆိုလိုသော ပုဂ္ဂိုလ်များကို တိကျစွာ ဖော်ပြပါ။ ထို့အပြင်၊ သင်၏ရည်ရွယ်ချက်ကို ရိုးရှင်းသည့် စကားလုံးများဖြင့် ဖော်ပြပါ။

範例: I want to sing for my family, especially during family gatherings, because I want to create a joyful and memorable atmosphere for all of us.

建議: အဖြေသည် မရှင်းလင်းသည့် စကားလုံးများနှင့် သဒ္ဒါမရှိမှုများကြောင့် နားလည်ရခက်ခဲသည်။ သင်၏အမြင်ကို ပိုမိုရှင်းလင်းစွာ၊ တိကျစွာ ဖော်ပြပါ။ သင်၏အကြောင်းပြချက်များကို သက်ဆိုင်ရာ စကားလုံးများဖြင့် ဖော်ပြပါ။

範例: Definitely, singing can bring happiness to people because it allows everyone to participate and express positive emotions. It also helps release feel-good hormones in our bodies.

× I like singing because singing made me feel relaxed and joyful atmosphere.

✓ I like singing because singing makes me feel relaxed and creates a joyful atmosphere.

The verb 'made' is past tense, but the sentence is about a general fact, so present tense 'makes' is appropriate. Also, 'joyful atmosphere' needs a verb like 'creates' to be grammatically correct.

× Moreover, they can last my stress and to live up my mood immediately when I sing.

✓ Moreover, it can relieve my stress and lift up my mood immediately when I sing.

'They' is incorrect because it does not refer to a clear plural noun. 'Last my stress' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'relieve my stress'. 'To live up my mood' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'lift up my mood'.

× Have you ever learnt how to sing?

✓ Have you ever learned how to sing?

'Learnt' is a British English past tense form; 'learned' is more common in American English. Both are acceptable, but consistency is important.

× Even I like to see him but I have never learned a how to sing properly in the chorus or SIM professionally because most of the time I'm missing with my friend. Have family for join.

✓ Even though I like to see him, I have never learned how to sing properly in the chorus or SIM professionally because most of the time I'm missing with my friends. I have family to join.

The sentence is fragmented and unclear. 'A how to sing' is incorrect; it should be 'how to sing'. 'Missing with my friend' is incorrect; it should be 'missing my friends' or 'missing out with my friends'. 'Have family for join' is incomplete and unclear; it should be 'I have family to join' or rephrased for clarity.

× I want to sing for I would like to see from my family, especially at family Care train because I would like to give them a wand and joyful atmosphere and as there I would like to think together with them to create a wonderful memorable things.

✓ I want to sing for my family, especially at family care training, because I would like to give them warmth and a joyful atmosphere. Also, I would like to think together with them to create wonderful memorable things.

'I want to sing for I would like to see from my family' is incorrect and unclear; it should be 'I want to sing for my family'. 'Family Care train' is unclear; possibly 'family care training'. 'Give them a wand' is incorrect; likely meant 'warmth'. 'Memorable things' should be 'memorable moments' or 'memories'.

× Definitely, singing can bring happiness to people because everyone can be participate an.

✓ Definitely, singing can bring happiness to people because everyone can participate.

'Can be participate an' is incorrect; 'can participate' is the correct form. 'Participate' is a verb and does not need 'be' or 'an'.

× Is prettier emotion and moreover, thinking the myth may FEA united at a kind of a positive emotion hormones from our body.

✓ It is a positive emotion, and moreover, singing may release a kind of positive emotion hormones from our body.

'Is prettier emotion' is incorrect; 'It is a positive emotion' is correct. The rest of the sentence is unclear; 'thinking the myth may FEA united' is nonsensical and likely meant 'singing may release positive emotion hormones'.