巧克力— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Improve grammatical accuracy and clarity by using correct verb forms and clearer expressions. Avoid redundancy and awkward phrasing. For example, say "Chocolate brings happiness to people because it contains substances that can improve mood."

範例: Yes, I really like eating chocolate because it brings happiness to people. When you eat chocolate, it releases chemicals that can improve your mood and make you feel happier.

建議: Avoid informal or inappropriate expressions like "chocolate alcoholic." Use more natural and formal language. Also, reduce filler words and improve sentence structure for clarity.

範例: I eat chocolate almost every day because it gives me comfort and happiness. I really enjoy having a small amount daily.

建議: Use correct vocabulary and grammar. Replace "banished me to eating chocolate" with "did not allow me to eat chocolate." Also, avoid repetition and improve sentence flow.

範例: No, I didn't eat chocolate often as a child because my parents didn't allow me to eat much. They were worried it would harm my teeth.

建議: Avoid repetition and improve sentence structure. Use linking words to connect ideas and provide specific examples.

範例: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it is used in many dishes, such as chocolate cake and chocolate milk. Its sweet taste appeals to many people.

建議: Use correct adjectives and clearer expressions. Replace "so sweetie chocolate" with "very sweet chocolate" and "bad taste" with "an unpleasant taste."

範例: My favorite flavor of chocolate is dark chocolate. I don't like very sweet chocolate because it tastes unpleasant to me.

建議: Improve sentence clarity and grammar. Use linking words and avoid redundancy. For example, say "Most people like chocolate, and different countries offer a wide variety of chocolates with unique appearances and flavors."

範例: Yes, I think chocolate makes a good gift because most people enjoy it. Different countries offer a wide variety of chocolates with unique appearances and flavors.

× I think chocolate can brings people, bring happiness to people.

✓ I think chocolate can bring happiness to people.

The modal verb 'can' should be followed by the base form of the verb without 's'. 'Brings' is incorrect after 'can'.

× Like when you eating chocolate it will you know it will bring some toughening into your body and make you happy.

✓ Like when you are eating chocolate, it will, you know, bring some toughening into your body and make you happy.

The verb 'eat' needs the auxiliary verb 'are' to form the present continuous tense 'are eating'. Also, commas improve clarity.

× Actually, I think eat chocolate can, you know, brings comfort and happiness.

✓ Actually, I think eating chocolate can, you know, bring comfort and happiness.

After 'can', the base form of the verb 'bring' should be used, not 'brings'. Also, 'eat chocolate' should be 'eating chocolate' to function as a noun phrase here.

× Because my parents banished me to eating chocolate because they think eating chocolate can can make my teeth bad so they don't want me to eat a lot of it.

✓ Because my parents banned me from eating chocolate because they think eating chocolate can make my teeth bad, so they don't want me to eat a lot of it.

The verb 'banish' is incorrectly used; 'ban' or 'banned' is appropriate. The preposition 'to' should be 'from' after 'banned'. Also, 'can can' is a repetition error. Commas improve sentence clarity.

× Because I think chocolate is a popular and it's a popular element in every dishes like chocolate cake, chocolate milk and lots of things can use chocolate.

✓ Because I think chocolate is popular and it's a popular ingredient in many dishes like chocolate cake, chocolate milk, and lots of other things that use chocolate.

The article 'a' is unnecessary before 'popular' as it is an adjective here. 'Element' is better replaced with 'ingredient' in this context. 'Every dishes' should be 'many dishes'. The phrase 'lots of things can use chocolate' is rephrased for clarity.

× My favorite flavor of chocolate is dark chocolate. I like some I don't like so sweetie chocolate because it makes me feel very bad taste.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is dark chocolate. I like some, but I don't like very sweet chocolate because it tastes bad to me.

'Sweetie' is incorrect; the correct adjective is 'sweet'. The sentence structure is improved by adding 'but' and rephrasing for clarity.

× Yes, absolutely, because I think most all most people like eating chocolate and in the different countries there always have diverse diversity catalog of chocolates, they have different appearance and tastes.

✓ Yes, absolutely, because I think almost all people like eating chocolate, and in different countries there is always a diverse catalog of chocolates with different appearances and tastes.

'Most all most' is incorrect; 'almost all' is correct. 'In the different countries' should be 'in different countries'. 'There always have' should be 'there is always'. 'Diverse diversity catalog' is redundant; 'diverse catalog' suffices. 'Appearance' should be plural 'appearances' to match 'tastes'.