零食— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 답변이 문법적으로 부정확하고 문장이 명확하지 않습니다. 문장을 간결하고 자연스럽게 구성하며, 질문에 직접적으로 답하는 문장으로 시작하세요. 또한, 불필요한 반복을 피하고, 문장 길이를 5문장 이내로 유지하세요.

範例: I usually eat snacks when I work on my computer. As a master's student, I spend a lot of time writing reports. Therefore, I often have snacks to keep my energy up during long study sessions.

建議: 답변이 명확하지 않고 문법적 오류가 많아 이해하기 어렵습니다. 질문에 직접 답하고, 이유를 구체적으로 설명하며, 문장을 논리적으로 연결하는 연결어를 사용하세요.

範例: I know that snacks are not very healthy, but I eat them because I get tired while working. However, I try to choose healthier options when possible to maintain my health.

建議: 답변이 중복되고 문장이 불완전합니다. 질문에 직접 답하고, 과거와 현재의 상황을 명확히 구분하여 설명하세요. 불필요한 중복을 피하고, 문장을 간결하게 만드세요.

範例: No, I didn't often eat snacks when I was young because I didn't like them. But recently, I eat snacks more often because I feel sleepy while working and need some energy.

建議: 답변이 자연스럽지 않고 문법 오류가 있습니다. 좋아하는 간식을 명확히 말하고, 그 이유와 건강에 대한 고려를 구체적으로 설명하세요. 문장 연결을 위해 적절한 연결어를 사용하세요.

範例: My favorite snack is potato chips, but they are high in fat and cholesterol, which is not good for my health. Therefore, I try to eat nuts instead because they are healthier.

× I'm a great graduated student for my master class, so I spend many time in front of the computer to write the documentary.

✓ I'm a great graduate student in my master's program, so I spend a lot of time in front of the computer writing the documentary.

'Graduated' is an adjective form incorrectly used here; 'graduate student' is the correct term. 'Many time' is incorrect because 'time' is uncountable; 'a lot of time' is appropriate. Also, 'master class' should be 'master's program' for clarity.

× So I ate the snacks at the.

✓ So I ate the snacks then.

The sentence is incomplete and lacks a proper time expression. 'At the' is incorrect without a following noun; 'then' is a suitable adverb to indicate time in past tense.

× Actually, I know the snack is not healthy for my right wife because there's no matter I have, there is no matter.

✓ Actually, I know snacks are not healthy for my body because no matter what I have, it doesn't matter.

'My right wife' is incorrect and likely a mishearing or mistranslation; 'my body' fits context. 'There's no matter I have, there is no matter' is unclear; corrected to 'no matter what I have, it doesn't matter' for clarity.

× I'm very tired to make a documentary and work, so I have to eat something.

✓ I'm very tired from making a documentary and working, so I have to eat something.

'Tired to make' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'tired from making' or 'tired of making'. Also, parallel structure requires 'making' and 'working'.

× So usually I saw.

✓ So usually I eat.

'Saw' is past tense and does not fit the context of habitual action; 'eat' in present tense is appropriate here.

× I didn't eat the snacks when I'm young, but when I was young.

✓ I didn't eat snacks when I was young.

Mixing past tense 'didn't eat' with present tense 'I'm young' is incorrect; both should be past tense 'was young'. Also, 'the snacks' is unnecessary; 'snacks' is sufficient.

× And my favorite snack is potato chip but the potato chip have the potato chip has very high fat so and cholesterol so it is not good for my healthy.

✓ My favorite snack is potato chips, but potato chips have very high fat and cholesterol, so they are not good for my health.

'Potato chip' should be plural 'potato chips' when referring generally. 'Have' agrees with plural 'chips'. 'My healthy' is incorrect; 'my health' is correct.

× So I try to eat the nuts instead of the snacks.

✓ So I try to eat nuts instead of snacks.

'The nuts' and 'the snacks' are unnecessary; general statements about food items do not require 'the'. Removing 'the' makes the sentence more natural.