零食— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Та илүү тодорхой, логик холбоос үг ашиглан хариултаа сайжруулж, илүү байгалийн, үр дүнтэй хэллэг ашиглах хэрэгтэй. Жишээ нь, "I usually eat snacks when I watch movies or feel bored because snacks are fun and sweet." гэж хэлж болно.

範例: I usually eat snacks when I watch movies or feel bored because snacks are fun and sweet.

建議: Хариултаа илүү тодорхой, логик холбоос үг ашиглан, илүү цэгцтэй, ойлгомжтой болгох хэрэгтэй. Жишээ нь, "I think eating snacks is not very healthy, so I try to be strict and only eat them once a week, or when someone offers me." гэж хэлж болно.

範例: I think eating snacks is not very healthy, so I try to be strict and only eat them once a week, or when someone offers me.

建議: Хариултаа илүү байгалийн, товч бөгөөд логик холбоос үг ашиглан сайжруулж, цагийн хувьд зөв хэллэг ашиглах хэрэгтэй. Жишээ нь, "Yes, when I was young, my parents spoiled me with many snacks, which made me gain weight and feel insecure, so I stopped eating too many snacks." гэж хэлж болно.

範例: Yes, when I was young, my parents spoiled me with many snacks, which made me gain weight and feel insecure, so I stopped eating too many snacks.

建議: Хариултаа илүү тодорхой, алдаагүй, логик холбоос үг ашиглан сайжруулж, үгсийг зөв сонгох хэрэгтэй. Жишээ нь, "My all-time favorite snack is chips because they have a sweet and spicy flavor that I really enjoy." гэж хэлж болно.

範例: My all-time favorite snack is chips because they have a sweet and spicy flavor that I really enjoy.

× I usually eat snacks when I watching a movie or kind of feel bored or when I hang out with my friends.

✓ I usually eat snacks when I am watching a movie or kind of feel bored or when I hang out with my friends.

The verb 'watching' needs an auxiliary verb 'am' to form the present continuous tense correctly. Without 'am', the sentence is grammatically incorrect.

× I usually snack because snack.

✓ I usually snack because I like snacks.

The original sentence is incomplete and unclear. Adding 'I like snacks' clarifies the reason for snacking and completes the sentence structure.

× It's the fun and the sweet tests.

✓ It's fun and sweet tasting.

'Fun' and 'sweet' are adjectives describing the snack. 'Tests' is incorrect here; 'tasting' or 'taste' should be used to describe flavor.

× But I kind of strict about snacks.

✓ But I am kind of strict about snacks.

The sentence lacks the verb 'am' to link the subject and adjective. 'Kind of' is an informal quantifier modifying 'strict', so the verb 'am' is necessary.

× Like once a week I eat snacks.

✓ I eat snacks once a week.

The sentence is understandable but the word order is awkward. Placing 'once a week' after the verb phrase is more natural.

× And other time when my when people give me some snacks and or time that when I need to eat next.

✓ Other times, when people give me some snacks or when I need to eat next, I eat snacks.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. Reordering and clarifying the sentence improves readability and grammatical correctness.

× Yes, when I was young my parents will spoil me with so many snacks and after that I had gained so many weights and I have become insecure about it and that's when I stopped eating snacks too much.

✓ Yes, when I was young my parents spoiled me with so many snacks and after that I gained a lot of weight and became insecure about it, so that's when I stopped eating too many snacks.

The sentence mixes tenses incorrectly. 'Will spoil' should be past tense 'spoiled' to match 'when I was young'. 'Had gained' should be simple past 'gained'. 'Weights' should be singular 'weight'. 'Too much' should be 'too many' to modify countable 'snacks'.

× My all time favorite snack is chips because whenever I eat cheapest it just gives me chills that the sweet taste and especially I love cheap starter have spicy flavored.

✓ My all-time favorite snack is chips because whenever I eat chips, it just gives me chills with the sweet taste, and especially I love chips that have a spicy flavor.

'Cheapest' is incorrect; it should be 'chips'. 'Cheap starter' is unclear and likely a mishearing or typo; corrected to 'chips that have a spicy flavor'. Also, 'all time' should be hyphenated as 'all-time'.