天气— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Try to make your answer more concise and natural by avoiding redundancy and improving sentence structure. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and correct some awkward phrasing.

範例: I live in Winnipeg, where the weather varies a lot. In winter, there's usually a lot of snow and cold rain, but recently it's been a mix of sun and rain. Sometimes it rains all day, and other times it's sunny and hot. So, the weather really depends on the day.

建議: Improve clarity by structuring your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details. Use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid awkward phrasing.

範例: I grew up in a hot climate, but now I prefer cold weather. I enjoy the warm weather in the Philippines sometimes, but when there is too much snow, I prefer to stay indoors. I like the cold, chilly winds, but not heavy snow.

建議: Your answer is clear but could be improved by using linking words and varying vocabulary to make it more natural and fluent.

範例: I prefer dry weather because commuting becomes difficult when it rains or the weather is bad. Therefore, I find it more comfortable and convenient to travel when the weather is dry.

建議: Clarify your answer by correcting unclear phrases and improving sentence structure. Use linking words to connect your ideas logically and avoid grammatical errors.

範例: The weather in Canada is quite unpredictable, so I check the forecast at least twice a day. Since I commute to work, it's better to prepare ahead than to get stuck on the road.

建議: Make your answer clearer and more concise by organizing your ideas logically and using linking words. Avoid repetition and improve sentence flow.

範例: Climate change has affected our weather in many ways. For example, wildfires have increased, which raises temperatures and produces smoke that degrades air quality.

建議: Improve fluency by avoiding repetition and using linking words. Also, clarify your plans with correct phrasing and sentence structure.

範例: Yes, I would love to visit cities with different climates because I want to explore and experience new things. In fact, I am going to study in Vancouver in the next few weeks to enjoy its mostly rainy weather.

× Right now I'm living in Winnipeg and rather over here is constantly raining.

✓ Right now I'm living in Winnipeg and rather over here it is constantly raining.

The sentence is missing the subject 'it' before 'is constantly raining'. In English, weather expressions require 'it' as the subject. Adding 'it' corrects the sentence structure.

× Previously in winter there's a lot of snow, lot of cold chill rains.

✓ Previously in winter there's a lot of snow and a lot of cold chill rain.

The phrase 'lot of cold chill rains' is incorrect because 'rain' is an uncountable noun and should not be pluralized as 'rains'. Also, 'a lot of' should be repeated before 'cold chill rain' for clarity.

× Sometimes it's raining all day, sometimes it's just hot burn sun outside.

✓ Sometimes it rains all day, sometimes it's just hot burning sun outside.

The verb 'raining' is correct in the first clause, but 'hot burn sun' is incorrect. 'Burn' should be the present participle 'burning' to describe the sun's effect as an adjective.

× So just it basically depends.

✓ So, it basically depends.

The word order 'just it' is incorrect. The correct order is 'it just' or simply 'it'. Adding a comma after 'So' improves readability.

× Being grown up in the hot weather climate country, I prefer a cold weather nowadays.

✓ Having grown up in a hot climate country, I prefer cold weather nowadays.

The phrase 'Being grown up' is incorrect; the correct form is 'Having grown up'. Also, 'hot weather climate country' is awkward; 'hot climate country' is better. 'A cold weather' is incorrect because 'weather' is uncountable; omit 'a'.

× I love the weather of Philippines sometimes but whenever it's so much snow outside then I would rather prefer stay inside.

✓ I sometimes love the weather of the Philippines, but whenever there is so much snow outside, I would rather stay inside.

'The Philippines' requires the definite article 'the'. 'Whenever it's so much snow' is incorrect; use 'there is so much snow'. 'Would rather prefer stay' is incorrect; 'would rather stay' is correct.

× So I like the cold chill winds but not that much snow.

✓ So I like the cold, chill winds but not that much snow.

A comma is needed between 'cold' and 'chill' to separate coordinate adjectives describing 'winds'.

× I prefer dry weather because whenever it's raining outside or any bad weather, it's so difficult for me to commute, so I find it more comfortable and convenient to travel outside in the dry weather.

✓ I prefer dry weather because whenever it's raining or the weather is bad, it's very difficult for me to commute, so I find it more comfortable and convenient to travel in dry weather.

'Raining outside' is redundant; 'raining' suffices. 'Any bad weather' is vague; 'the weather is bad' is clearer. 'Travel outside in the dry weather' is redundant; 'travel in dry weather' is better.

× PS Goes better is completely unpredictable here in Canada, so I check the weather at least twice a day because I have to commute to work so it's better to prepare ahead of time than to struck on the road.

✓ The weather here in Canada is completely unpredictable, so I check the weather at least twice a day because I have to commute to work. It's better to prepare ahead of time than to be stuck on the road.

'PS Goes better' is unclear and likely a mishearing; replaced with 'The weather here'. 'Struck' is the past tense of 'strike'; the correct past participle here is 'stuck'. The sentence is long and run-on; splitting improves clarity.

× Oh, the climate changes are affecting our weather a lot in different ways since due to the climate changes nature wildfires are increasing which are turning which are resulting in increase of heat and smoke outside which is degrading the air quality.

✓ Oh, climate change is affecting our weather a lot in different ways. Due to climate change, natural wildfires are increasing, which is resulting in increased heat and smoke outside, degrading the air quality.

'Climate changes' should be 'climate change' (uncountable). 'Nature wildfires' should be 'natural wildfires'. The sentence is long and confusing; breaking into shorter sentences improves clarity. 'Increase of heat' should be 'increased heat'.

× Yes, I love I would love to visit different cities with different climates because I want to explore and experience new things.

✓ Yes, I would love to visit different cities with different climates because I want to explore and experience new things.

The phrase 'I love I would love' is redundant and incorrect. Removing the first 'I love' corrects the sentence.

× In the upcoming next few weeks, I'm going to study Vancouver to enjoy the weather there because I have heard that every time it's mostly rainy over there.

✓ In the upcoming next few weeks, I'm going to visit Vancouver to enjoy the weather there because I have heard that it is mostly rainy there.

'Study Vancouver' is incorrect; the intended meaning is likely 'visit Vancouver'. 'Every time it's mostly rainy' is awkward; 'it is mostly rainy there' is clearer.