写作— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and grammatical. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect word forms (e.g., 'throw' → 'through', 'pad' → 'paper' or 'notebook').

範例: I don't write very often because digital tools have replaced paper for me. For example, I use note apps on my phone to jot down ideas and emails, so I rarely use a pen and paper.

建議: Give a clear, complete answer with specific content and reasons. Use one topic sentence stating what you like to write, then add a reason and an example linked by a conjunction (e.g., 'because' or 'for example'). Avoid fragments.

範例: I enjoy writing about memorable personal experiences because they help me remember important moments. For example, I write short journal entries about trips or family celebrations to capture details and emotions.

建議: Be clearer and more logical: state your opinion, then give a specific reason and an example. Use linking words like 'because' and 'for instance'. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases.

範例: Yes, I think what I write will change over time because my opinions and experiences develop as I grow. For instance, notes I wrote as a teenager were brief, but now I write more reflective and detailed entries.

建議: Answer directly and give a concise reason with an example. Use clear linking words (e.g., 'because', 'so') and correct phrases ('I prefer typing on my phone'). Avoid filler words like 'actually' and 'pretty much' when unnecessary.

範例: I prefer typing, mainly on my phone, because it's faster and more convenient. For example, I can quickly search, edit and share notes compared to handwriting.

建議: Provide a direct frequency answer and expand with one specific detail about your alternative method. Use consistent tense and avoid capitalizing common nouns unnecessarily.

範例: I hardly ever keep a physical diary. Instead, I use the Notes app on my phone almost daily to record short entries or ideas.

建議: Be specific and organized: start with a topic sentence listing the main methods, then give one or two brief examples with linking words. Correct grammar and word order (e.g., 'I take photographs', 'I make videos').

範例: I use several methods to record my life, such as taking photographs and making short videos. For instance, I take photos during trips and record videos of family events, and I also write short notes in my phone's notepad.

× Actually I don't write a lot due to excess of technology and also Internet, so I don't need.

✓ Actually I don't write a lot because of the widespread use of technology and the Internet, so I don't need to.

Use 'because of' or 'due to' with a noun phrase; 'excess of technology' is unnatural. 'Widespread use of technology and the Internet' is clearer and corrects preposition usage and collocation.

× To write throw any raw materials like pencil and pad, I use technological apps.

✓ To write, instead of using raw materials like a pencil and a pad, I use technological apps.

The original misuses 'throw' and lacks articles. Correct prepositions and structure: 'instead of' expresses replacement, and include articles 'a pencil and a pad'.

× I'm very fond of writing my interesting moment along with any memorable experience which I had that I would like to write in pair and.

✓ I'm very fond of writing about interesting moments and memorable experiences that I have had and would like to record.

Fix word forms and word order: use 'writing about', plural 'moments', 'memorable experiences', correct verb tense 'have had'. Remove unclear phrase 'in pair and'. This addresses incorrect adjective/adverb and sentence structure.

× Or I also.

✓ Or I also write about other personal events.

Original is a sentence fragment lacking a verb and object. Provide a complete clause that fits context, correcting sentence structure.

× Of course I think the things that I write would change in the future because it's a continuous process then past past our previous to present.

✓ Of course I think the things that I write will change in the future because writing is a continuous process from the past through the present.

Use correct tense/modal 'will' for future certainty and correct gerund 'writing is'. Fix prepositions 'from...through' and remove repeated words. This addresses incorrect present participle use and tense/modal issues.

× So I think it is possible to change.

✓ So I think it is possible that they will change.

Clarify the subject: 'it' is vague. Replace with 'they' referring to 'the things I write' and use 'will change' for future reference. This fixes pronoun reference.

× Actually pretty much both, but mostly I guess enjoy typing because of excess of Internet so and I find it quite appealing to me personally so I prefer typing on mobile phone.

✓ Actually I like both, but mostly I enjoy typing because of the widespread use of the Internet, and I find it personally more appealing, so I prefer typing on my mobile phone.

Correct adverb placement and remove redundancies. Use 'I like both' and 'mostly I enjoy typing'. Fix preposition 'on my mobile phone' and phrasing 'widespread use of the Internet'.

× Actually, hardly ever. Instead I enjoy typing on my notepad on my phone, so I hardly carry Diaries with me.

✓ Actually, hardly ever. Instead I enjoy typing on the notepad app on my phone, so I hardly carry diaries with me.

'Diaries' should be lowercase and contextually plural is fine, but 'notepad' as app needs article 'the' or 'the notepad app'. Capitalization corrected. This addresses singular/plural and article usage.

× There are lots of methods that are used to record my life.

✓ There are many methods I use to record my life.

Improve pronoun and verb use: 'I use' is more natural than passive 'that are used'. 'Many' is more natural than 'lots of' in formal correction.

× Among them, sometimes I capture some photographs along with I.

✓ Among them, sometimes I capture photographs.

Remove incorrect 'along with I' which is ungrammatical. 'Capture photographs' is sufficient and corrects preposition/pronoun misuse.

× I also make a video for memorable this time.

✓ I also make videos of memorable moments.

Correct word order and noun forms: 'videos of memorable moments' replaces ungrammatical phrase 'for memorable this time'. Fixes sentence structure and noun usage.

× Apart from that, I also write.

✓ Apart from that, I also write notes about my experiences.

Original is short but grammatical; improved to be clearer and more specific. Adds object to 'write' to avoid vagueness and fit context.