家乡— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Your answer needs to be clearer and more natural. Avoid grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to organize your ideas logically and use linking words to connect your points. Also, be specific about your hometown's features and avoid vague phrases like 'only 40s'.

範例: I'm originally from Tangayoo, a small and quiet town in the Hakka division. It has many industries and restaurants, which provide jobs for the local people. Despite being a small town, it offers a peaceful environment and a close-knit community.

建議: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains some errors. Try to make your sentences complete and avoid filler words like 'et cetera'. Use linking words to connect your ideas and be more specific about what you like, such as naming particular facilities or shops.

範例: I like my hometown because it has a peaceful environment and friendly people. Additionally, there are many job opportunities and good facilities like shops and a reliable transportation system, which make life convenient.

建議: Your answer is generally clear but can be improved by combining sentences and avoiding hesitation sounds like 'Hmm'. Also, try to provide a bit more detail to enrich your answer.

範例: I have lived in my hometown since childhood and have spent my entire life there. I live with my parents and siblings, which makes it a comfortable and familiar place for me.

建議: Your answer is unclear and grammatically incorrect. Try to organize your ideas with proper linking words and complete sentences. Be specific about educational and recreational facilities for young people.

範例: Yes, my hometown is a good place for young people because it has many schools, colleges, and coaching centers where students can learn easily. Moreover, there are playgrounds where young people can enjoy sports and outdoor activities.

× I'm originally from Tangayoo which is a small and quiet place located in that Hakka division.

✓ I'm originally from Tangayoo, which is a small and quiet place located in the Hakka division.

The preposition 'that' is incorrectly used before 'Hakka division'. The correct definite article 'the' should be used to specify the known division. Also, a comma is needed before 'which' to separate the clauses.

× It is only 40s, lots of industries, restaurants some and it provides job to them local people despite of being in the cities.

✓ It has only about 40, lots of industries, some restaurants, and it provides jobs to the local people despite being in the city.

The phrase 'only 40s' is unclear; it should be 'only about 40' to indicate quantity. 'Restaurants some' is incorrect word order; 'some restaurants' is correct. 'Job' should be plural 'jobs' to match 'industries' and 'restaurants'. 'Them local people' is incorrect pronoun use; 'the local people' is correct. 'Despite of' is incorrect; 'despite' should be used without 'of'. 'Cities' should be singular 'city' if referring to one city.

× The city also has the peaceful environment and community.

✓ The city also has a peaceful environment and community.

The definite article 'the' is incorrectly used before 'peaceful environment' and 'community' when these are general concepts. The indefinite article 'a' is appropriate here.

× I like about my hometown is the the peaceful environment, the people are friendly, the Jo, the shop opportunities and the facilities we get.

✓ What I like about my hometown is the peaceful environment, friendly people, job and shopping opportunities, and the facilities we have.

The original sentence has incorrect structure and redundancy ('the the'). 'I like about' is incorrect; it should be 'What I like about'. 'The people are friendly' should be 'friendly people' to fit the list. 'The Jo' is likely a typo for 'job'. 'The shop opportunities' should be 'shopping opportunities'. 'Facilities we get' is better expressed as 'facilities we have'.

× We can easily find anything what we want and the transportation system, et cetera.

✓ We can easily find anything we want, and there is a good transportation system, etc.

'Anything what we want' is incorrect; 'anything we want' is correct. The sentence is incomplete and lacks a verb for 'the transportation system'; adding 'there is a good' clarifies the meaning. 'Et cetera' is better abbreviated as 'etc.'.

× I've been living there since my childhood.

✓ I have lived there since my childhood.

The present perfect continuous 'I've been living' is less appropriate with 'since my childhood' which indicates a long, completed duration; present perfect simple 'I have lived' is more suitable.

× I live there with my parents, my siblings.

✓ I live there with my parents and my siblings.

The sentence lacks the conjunction 'and' between 'parents' and 'my siblings' to correctly list the people.

× Yes, my hometown is a good place for young people there are lots of school colleges and teach coaching centers of students or young people can learn easily from there and their playground where they can play the.

✓ Yes, my hometown is a good place for young people. There are lots of schools, colleges, and coaching centers where students or young people can learn easily, and there are playgrounds where they can play.

The original sentence is a run-on sentence lacking proper punctuation and conjunctions. 'School colleges' should be 'schools, colleges'. 'Teach coaching centers' is incorrect; it should be 'coaching centers'. 'Of students or young people can learn easily from there' is awkward; rephrased for clarity. 'Their playground where they can play the' is incomplete; corrected to 'playgrounds where they can play'.