家乡— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Your answer is generally clear but can be more natural and concise. Avoid redundancy like "very well known in whole world"; instead, say "famous worldwide." Also, provide a clearer topic sentence and use linking words to connect ideas.

範例: My hometown is Durkha, which is famous worldwide for the Kavinsim temple. This temple attracts many visitors every year, making the town well-known.

建議: Your answer shows good content but needs better structure and grammar. Use linking words like "because" and "for example" properly. Also, avoid vague phrases like "good human being"; instead, say "friendly people."

範例: I like my hometown because it is a beautiful place surrounded by trees and filled with the sound of birds. For example, when city life becomes hectic, it offers a peaceful environment with friendly people.

建議: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Use a direct topic sentence to answer the question, then add supporting details. Avoid confusing phrases like "my birth giver" and "saved in cities."

範例: I was born in Dholka, but I have not lived there for long because my family moved to the city shortly after my birth. Therefore, I don't know much about the town.

建議: Your answer addresses the question but can be improved by using correct grammar and clearer linking words. Instead of "currently damaging younger people lungs," say "is currently damaging young people's lungs." Also, use linking words like "because" and "therefore."

範例: Definitely, my hometown is a better place for young people because city pollution is currently damaging young people's lungs. Therefore, unlike in cities where we need to cover our faces, the air in my hometown is clean and safe.

× This place is very well known in whole world.

✓ This place is very well known in the whole world.

The sentence is missing the definite article 'the' before 'whole world'. In English, when referring to something specific like 'whole world', the definite article 'the' is required to specify it.

× I like everything about my hometown because it's really beautiful place.

✓ I like everything about my hometown because it's a really beautiful place.

The sentence is missing the indefinite article 'a' before 'really beautiful place'. In English, singular countable nouns require an article ('a' or 'the').

× If you ever get hectic by city's life then it would be the best place to be there because it is really surrounded by trees, bird sound and good human being.

✓ If you ever get hectic by city life then it would be the best place to be because it is really surrounded by trees, bird sounds, and good human beings.

The phrase 'get hectic by city's life' is incorrect; it should be 'get hectic by city life' without the possessive. Also, 'bird sound' should be plural 'bird sounds' and 'good human being' should be plural 'good human beings' to match the context.

× I was given birth by my mom in there.

✓ I was born there by my mom.

The phrase 'was given birth' is incorrect. The correct passive form is 'was born'. Also, 'in there' is better expressed as 'there'.

× I don't live that much in Dholka because my mother, my birth giver, actually saved in cities the day I was born.

✓ I didn't live much in Dholka because my mother, my birth giver, actually stayed in the city the day I was born.

The phrase 'saved in cities' is incorrect; likely intended 'stayed in the city'. Also, 'don't live that much' should be past tense 'didn't live much' to match the past context.

× I don't know that much about.

✓ I don't know much about it.

The sentence is incomplete and missing the object. 'Know that much about' requires an object to complete the meaning.

× Definitely, it is really a better place for young people because city pollution has currently damaging younger people lungs.

✓ Definitely, it is really a better place for young people because city pollution is currently damaging young people's lungs.

The phrase 'has currently damaging' is incorrect; it should be 'is currently damaging' to indicate ongoing action. Also, 'younger people lungs' should be 'young people's lungs' to show possession.

× We really need to hide and cover our face while walking around cities, but in my hometown it would be very safe.

✓ We really need to hide and cover our faces while walking around cities, but in my hometown it is very safe.

'Cover our face' should be plural 'cover our faces' to agree with plural subject 'we'. Also, 'would be very safe' is better as 'is very safe' to indicate a general truth.