聚会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Try to make your answer more natural and concise. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases like "I'm a extra work person." Start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add specific reasons with linking words. For example, use "I really enjoy parties because they allow me to express my feelings and spend quality time with loved ones."

示例: Yes, I really enjoy parties because they give me a chance to express my feelings and spend quality time with my friends and family. Moreover, parties help strengthen our relationships and create happy memories together.

建议: Your answer is unclear and contains many hesitations and repetitions. Try to respond directly with a clear topic sentence and support it with specific details using linking words. Avoid filler words and incomplete sentences. For example, say "I often had parties as a child because I lived in a large joint family, so we celebrated many occasions together."

示例: When I was a child, I often had parties because I lived in a big joint family. We celebrated birthdays and festivals together, which made those times very special and enjoyable.

建议: Your answer has good content but is affected by hesitations and unclear phrases. Try to speak more fluently and structure your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by specific details using linking words. For example, "Although I have never organized a large party, I once planned a small celebration for my mother's birthday, which was very successful."

示例: I have never organized a large party because it can be difficult, but I did organize a small party for my mother's birthday last year. It was a great success, and everyone enjoyed the celebration.

× I'm a extra work person and I really like to do parties with my friends and with my family members because I think it's a best time to express our feeling and spend the quality of time with our loved ones.

✓ I'm an extra hardworking person and I really like to have parties with my friends and family members because I think it's the best time to express our feelings and spend quality time with our loved ones.

The article 'a' should be 'an' before a vowel sound in 'extra'. 'Extra work person' is incorrect; 'extra hardworking person' or 'hardworking person' is more appropriate. 'Do parties' is unnatural; 'have parties' is better. 'A best time' should be 'the best time' because it refers to a specific best time. 'Feeling' should be plural 'feelings' to match the context. 'Spend the quality of time' is incorrect; it should be 'spend quality time' without 'the' or 'of'.

× I had lots of family member in my, when I was a child.

✓ I had lots of family members when I was a child.

The noun 'member' should be plural 'members' because 'lots of' indicates more than one. Also, the phrase 'in my' is incomplete and unnecessary here, so it is removed for clarity.

× So when, when there's a body, body comes and when, when my family members get, uh.

✓ So when somebody comes and when my family members get together, uh.

The phrase 'there's a body' is incorrect; it should be 'somebody' to refer to a person. The sentence is incomplete and unclear; adding 'get together' clarifies the meaning.

× As it's a very difficult to organise a party, uh, if I talk about myself, I never get that chance to organise a, a, a large event part large parties.

✓ As it's very difficult to organise a party, if I talk about myself, I have never had the chance to organise a large event or large parties.

The phrase 'it's a very difficult' should be 'it's very difficult' without 'a'. 'I never get that chance' should be in present perfect 'I have never had the chance' to indicate experience up to now. 'Part large parties' is unclear; corrected to 'a large event or large parties' for clarity.

× But I remember, uh, time when I organised a small party for my mother's body and it was quite successful.

✓ But I remember a time when I organised a small party for my mother's birthday and it was quite successful.

The word 'body' is incorrect; it should be 'birthday'. The rest of the sentence is correct in past tense.

× And we, we are celebrate all.

✓ And we all celebrated it.

The phrase 'we are celebrate all' is grammatically incorrect. The correct past tense form is 'we all celebrated it' to match the past event.