生日— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is a bit unclear and lacks coherence. Try to structure your response with a clear topic sentence, followed by specific details, and use linking words to connect your ideas. Also, avoid redundancy and grammatical errors. For example, mention the activities you do in order and explain briefly.

示例: On my birthday, I usually wake up early and visit the Golden Temple. After that, I celebrate with my friends by having a party. In the evening, I have a small celebration with my family members.

建议: Your answer needs better grammar and clearer expression. Use past tense correctly when talking about the past. Also, try to avoid vague phrases like 'any club or any restaurant' and be more specific. Use linking words to contrast past and present.

示例: When I was young, I used to celebrate my birthday by renting a club or restaurant and having a party with my friends. However, nowadays I do not make any special plans because I feel it is a waste of time to go to a restaurant alone.

建议: Your answer shows your opinion but needs clearer structure and better vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence, then explain your reasons with linking words. Avoid repetition and improve grammar.

示例: Yes, I believe celebrating birthdays is important because it happens only once a year. Moreover, it is a good opportunity to get together with friends and enjoy special moments.

建议: Your answer is honest but lacks specific knowledge and has grammatical errors. Try to express your uncertainty politely and use better vocabulary. Also, avoid vague phrases like 'enjoyful moment'.

示例: I am from India, so I am not very familiar with birthdays celebrated in China. However, I think the president's birthday might be important there, and people probably celebrate it with respect and joy.

× Well to be honest I'm on my birthday.

✓ Well, to be honest, I am on my birthday.

The sentence is incomplete and unclear. It seems the student intended to say something about what they do on their birthday. The phrase 'I'm on my birthday' is incorrect. A better sentence would be 'Well, to be honest, on my birthday, I...'. The issue is with sentence structure and tense usage.

× Firstly I'm getting early in the morning and when my golden temple and apart from them I also celebrate my birthday with my friends to celebrate one birthday party and at the end I am in the evening I celebrate my birthday with my family members in a mini party.

✓ Firstly, I get up early in the morning and visit the Golden Temple. Apart from that, I also celebrate my birthday with my friends by having a birthday party, and in the evening, I celebrate my birthday with my family members in a small party.

The original sentence has multiple tense and structure issues. 'I'm getting early' is incorrect; the correct form is 'I get up early'. 'When my golden temple' is incomplete and unclear; it should be 'visit the Golden Temple'. The sentence is run-on and needs to be broken into clearer parts. The verb forms and prepositions are corrected to fit present tense and proper usage.

× Well I am in a young age, I celebrate my birthday with my friends to rent any club or any restaurant to do party and but nowadays I do not have any certain plans on my birthday and I think it's a waste of time to went any restaurant for nobody.

✓ When I was young, I celebrated my birthday with my friends by renting a club or a restaurant to have a party, but nowadays I do not have any certain plans for my birthday and I think it's a waste of time to go to any restaurant alone.

The sentence incorrectly uses present tense 'I am in a young age' instead of past tense 'When I was young'. 'Celebrate' should be past tense 'celebrated' to match the time frame. 'To went' is incorrect; the correct form is 'to go'. The sentence also has issues with prepositions and clarity, which are corrected.

× Yes, I think to celebrate birthday is very important because birthday is a thing which celebrate in a year and we should celebrate our birthday with our friends because it is a way to came together and we should celebrate that.

✓ Yes, I think celebrating birthdays is very important because a birthday is an event that happens once a year, and we should celebrate our birthdays with our friends because it is a way to come together, and we should celebrate that.

The phrase 'to celebrate birthday' is incorrect; the gerund form 'celebrating birthdays' is appropriate here. 'Which celebrate in a year' is incorrect; it should be 'that happens once a year'. 'To came together' is incorrect; the correct form is 'to come together'. These corrections improve grammatical accuracy and clarity.

× Well, I am from India and I do not know more about China but I think the president birthday in China is most important and that's why they celebrate their president's birthday with a very peaceful and enjoyful moment.

✓ Well, I am from India and I do not know much about China, but I think the president's birthday in China is the most important, and that's why they celebrate their president's birthday with a very peaceful and enjoyable event.

'I do not know more about China' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'I do not know much about China'. 'President birthday' should be 'president's birthday' to show possession. 'Enjoyful' is not a correct word; the correct adjective is 'enjoyable'. Also, 'moment' is better replaced with 'event' for clarity.