网络— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer lacks clarity and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a clear topic sentence and support it with specific details using correct grammar. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases.

示例: I started using the internet in 2013 when I first tried to access social media. At that time, I didn't use the internet much, but now it has become an essential part of daily life, and I use it for many different things.

建议: Your answer is somewhat unclear and repetitive. Use a clear topic sentence and link your ideas logically. Try to avoid filler words and provide specific details about your online habits.

示例: I usually go online about five to ten times a day, mostly in the morning and at night. During the day, I don't have much time to use the internet because of my busy schedule.

建议: Your answer addresses the question but is repetitive and grammatically incorrect. Provide a clear topic sentence and support it with specific reasons, using linking words to improve coherence.

示例: Yes, during my secondary school exams in 2019, I was not allowed to use the internet because I spent too much time surfing, which distracted me from studying properly.

建议: Your answer is understandable but contains grammatical errors and redundancy. Use a clear topic sentence and provide specific examples with proper linking words.

示例: Yes, I think I spend too much time online, especially on social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube, because I stay at home most of the time to study.

建议: Your answer is unclear and contains many grammatical mistakes. Try to give a clear topic sentence and support it with specific activities you would do without the internet, using correct grammar and linking words.

示例: It is hard to imagine a day without the internet. However, if I didn't have it, I would spend more time playing sports, doing different kinds of work, or reading books.

× I start using the Internet at 2013 and I was in.

✓ I started using the Internet in 2013.

The sentence refers to a past event, so the verb 'start' should be in the past tense 'started'. Also, the preposition 'at' is incorrect for years; 'in' should be used instead.

× I was trying to open the social media.

✓ I was trying to open social media.

The phrase 'the social media' is incorrect because 'social media' is an uncountable noun and does not require 'the'. Removing 'the' corrects the sentence.

× Since that time I didn't use too much Internet.

✓ Since that time, I haven't used the Internet much.

The phrase 'Since that time' requires the present perfect tense to indicate an action continuing up to now. Also, 'too much Internet' is awkward; 'the Internet much' is more natural.

× Yes, but now Internet is in parameter things and we can't move single different things.

✓ Yes, but now the Internet is a part of everything, and we can't do anything differently without it.

The original sentence is unclear and contains incorrect phrases like 'in parameter things' and 'move single different things'. The correction clarifies the intended meaning and uses proper expressions.

× Yeah, it it, it depends uh, though I can't clearly remember it can be 5 or 10 times, but when I see any guys notification, I go there.

✓ Yeah, it depends. I can't clearly remember, but it can be 5 or 10 times. When I see any guy's notification, I go there.

The sentence has repetition and unclear structure. Removing repeated words and splitting into clearer sentences improves readability. Also, 'guys' should be possessive 'guy's'.

× But usually I go at the online at at at morning and at night, but during daytime I don't have enough time on the online.

✓ But usually I go online in the morning and at night, but during the daytime I don't have enough time to be online.

The preposition 'at' is incorrect before 'online' and 'morning'. 'Go online' does not require 'at'. Also, 'during daytime' needs 'the', and 'time on the online' is incorrect; 'time to be online' is correct.

× Yes, there was my there was my secondary school Saturday examination at 2019.

✓ Yes, it was my secondary school Saturday examination in 2019.

The phrase 'there was my there was my' is repetitive and incorrect. 'It was' is appropriate. Also, the preposition for years is 'in', not 'at'.

× I couldn't couldn't I have a limitation on using the Internet because I was too much time busy with surfing on the Internet with different types of things and it was much more time consuming and I couldn't proper concentrate it on my.

✓ I couldn't; I had a limitation on using the Internet because I was spending too much time surfing the Internet with different things, and it was very time-consuming, so I couldn't properly concentrate on my studies.

The sentence has repeated words and incorrect modal verb usage. 'I couldn't' is repeated unnecessarily. 'I have a limitation' should be past tense 'I had a limitation'. 'Too much time busy' is incorrect; 'spending too much time' is correct. 'Proper concentrate it on my' is incorrect; 'properly concentrate on my studies' is correct.

× Just now I think I spent too much time on a line because most of the time I stay at the home and we said study.

✓ Right now, I think I spend too much time online because most of the time I stay at home and study.

'Just now' is incorrect for present opinion; 'Right now' or 'Currently' is better. 'I spent' is past tense, but the context is present, so 'I spend' is correct. 'On a line' should be 'online'. 'Stay at the home' should be 'stay at home'. 'We said study' is unclear; 'and study' is correct.

× I spend too much time on the social media and the other things and the social media, especially Facebook, Instagram and YouTube, I spent more time.

✓ I spend too much time on social media and other things, especially Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube, where I spend most of my time.

'The social media' is incorrect; 'social media' is uncountable and does not need 'the'. 'The other things' should be 'other things'. The sentence is repetitive; rephrasing improves clarity.

× Without Internet, it's too hard to think a single day without Internet.

✓ Without the Internet, it's hard to imagine a single day without it.

The sentence is repetitive and awkward. Adding 'the' before 'Internet' is necessary. 'Think a single day without Internet' is incorrect; 'imagine a single day without it' is better.

× But without Internet I believe that I would spend my laser time on another time on playing or any kinds of sports or do various kinds of work or reading books especially and Internet when came it.

✓ But without the Internet, I believe I would spend my leisure time playing sports, doing various kinds of work, or especially reading books.

The sentence has multiple errors: 'laser time' should be 'leisure time'; 'another time on playing' is incorrect; 'any kinds of sports' should be 'playing sports'; 'and Internet when came it' is unclear and removed. The correction clarifies and corrects the sentence.