网络— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer needs to be more natural and grammatically correct. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases like 'using Internet by the brown'. Try to give a clear time reference and use correct tense and articles.

示例: I started using the internet when I was a child because it has become an essential part of modern life.

建议: Try to organize your answer with clear sentences and avoid filler words like 'uh'. Use correct grammar and specify your time clearly. Use linking words to connect ideas logically.

示例: As a CSC student, I go online almost 20 to 30 hours a week because it provides me with various types of knowledge and helps improve my skills.

建议: Improve your grammar, especially verb tenses and articles. Make your sentences clearer and avoid repetition. Use linking words to explain your ideas coherently.

示例: Yes, when I was a child, my parents did not allow me to use the internet because they thought it was harmful to my mind and health. However, I believed that in this modern era, it is impossible to live without the internet because it helps us a lot.

建议: Avoid filler words and improve sentence structure. Use correct prepositions and verb forms. Provide clear reasons and link your ideas logically.

示例: No, I don't spend too much time online. I use it casually and also spend time doing offline activities like working and cooking.

建议: Use correct verb tenses and articles. Avoid filler words and unclear phrases. Organize your answer with linking words to make it coherent.

示例: Without the internet, I would spend time working in my rooftop garden, cooking for my family, and playing with my many cousins to enjoy my free time.

× As it is in modern era so everyone using Internet by the brown.

✓ As it is the modern era, everyone is using the Internet by the way.

The phrase 'in modern era' requires the definite article 'the' before 'modern era'. Also, 'using Internet by the brown' is incorrect; it should be 'using the Internet by the way' or a similar phrase. The preposition 'in' is correct but needs the article, and 'by the brown' is a misuse of preposition and phrase.

× I also use the Internet when I was a children.

✓ I also used the Internet when I was a child.

The word 'children' is plural, but the subject refers to a singular person, so 'child' should be used. Also, the tense should be past tense 'used' to match 'when I was'.

× Uh as I am a CSC student so I uh use online a lot of time almost uh 30 to 20 hours I spend off online.

✓ Uh, as I am a CSC student, I use the internet online a lot of time, almost 20 to 30 hours I spend online.

The phrase 'use online a lot of time' is awkward; 'use the internet online' or 'go online' is better. Also, 'spend off online' is incorrect; it should be 'spend online'. The preposition 'off' is misused here.

× It provide me different type of knowledge and it helps improving my skills.

✓ It provides me with different types of knowledge and helps improve my skills.

The verb 'provide' should be 'provides' to agree with singular subject 'It'. 'Different type' should be plural 'different types'. Also, 'helps improving' is incorrect; it should be 'helps improve'.

× I use different type of uh facilities.

✓ I use different types of facilities.

'Type' should be plural 'types' because it refers to multiple facilities.

× Yes, when I was a children, my parents didn't allowed me to use Internet because it they thought it's harmful for my mind and my health as well.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, my parents didn't allow me to use the Internet because they thought it was harmful to my mind and my health as well.

'Children' is plural; 'child' is correct here. 'Didn't allowed' is incorrect; 'didn't allow' is correct because 'did' is auxiliary and the main verb should be base form. 'It they thought' is redundant; 'they thought' is sufficient. 'Harmful for' should be 'harmful to'.

× No, I don't spend too much time in online.

✓ No, I don't spend too much time online.

The preposition 'in' is unnecessary before 'online'. 'Spend time online' is the correct phrase.

× Uh, I also do something offline like work and then I also, uh, doing cooking for a while.

✓ Uh, I also do some offline activities like work, and then I also do cooking for a while.

'Doing cooking' is incorrect; 'do cooking' or 'cook' is correct. Also, 'something offline like work' is better as 'some offline activities like work'.

× I have a rooftop garden I worked on here sometime.

✓ I have a rooftop garden I work on here sometimes.

'Worked' is past tense but context suggests present habitual action, so 'work' is better. 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' to indicate frequency.

× I also cooking for my family and myself, uh, without using Internet.

✓ I also cook for my family and myself without using the Internet.

'Cooking' should be 'cook' to match the verb form. 'Using Internet' requires the definite article 'the' before 'Internet'.

× I have a lot of cousins uh, I saw I play with themes and enjoy my free times.

✓ I have a lot of cousins. I play with them and enjoy my free time.

'Saw' is incorrect and unnecessary. 'Themes' should be 'them' (pronoun). 'Free times' should be 'free time' as an uncountable noun.