网络— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Try to make your answer more concise and avoid repeating the same information. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and ensure clarity. For example, start with a clear topic sentence and then add supporting details logically.

示例: I started using the Internet when I was about 11 years old, after I got my first phone. Since then, I created several social media accounts and became familiar with how the Internet works.

建议: Avoid redundancy such as 'often' and 'very frequently' together. Use linking words to connect your ideas and be more specific about your online activities. Also, try to use more natural expressions instead of slang like 'doom scrolling'.

示例: I go online quite often because I am not attending university at the moment and have a lot of free time. During this time, I enjoy browsing various social media platforms to keep myself entertained.

建议: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to express your ideas more clearly and use linking words to improve coherence. Also, avoid vague phrases and explain your points with specific details.

示例: When we go on vacation, only one family member usually has access to the Internet to save phone battery. This means we use the Internet less during trips, but we are not completely without it.

建议: Avoid repeating information already mentioned. Use linking words to connect your ideas and try to be more concise. Also, replace informal phrases like 'scrolling around' with more formal expressions.

示例: Yes, I believe I spend too much time online because I have a lot of free time without university commitments. I often browse various platforms without realizing how long I have been online.

建议: Your answer is good but could be improved by making it more concise and using linking words to connect ideas. Also, avoid slang like 'doom scrolling' and try to use more formal vocabulary.

示例: Without the Internet, life would be difficult, but I would spend my time doing household chores like laundry, washing dishes, and cleaning. This way, I could help my mom and stay productive.

× Whenever we go on vacation, only one of my family members have to hold the Internet.

✓ Whenever we go on vacation, only one of my family members has to hold the Internet.

The subject 'one of my family members' is singular, so the verb should be 'has' instead of 'have' to agree in number.

× I'm planning to join on the winter.

✓ I'm planning to join in the winter.

The correct preposition to use with seasons is 'in', not 'on'. So, it should be 'join in the winter'.

× I don't attend to any universities a lot, so I have a lot of free time.

✓ I don't attend any universities a lot, so I have a lot of free time.

The verb 'attend' does not require the preposition 'to' when referring to institutions like universities. The correct form is 'attend any universities'.

× I'm planning to join on the winter.

✓ I'm planning to join in the winter.

The preposition 'on' is incorrect when referring to seasons; 'in' is the correct preposition to use with seasons like 'winter'.

× I do love doom scrolling around different social media platform making me less bored.

✓ I do love doom scrolling around different social media platforms making me less bored.

The noun 'platform' should be plural 'platforms' to match 'different', which implies more than one.

× I do love doom scrolling around different social media platform making me less bored.

✓ I do love doom scrolling around different social media platforms making me less bored.

The word 'platform' should be plural 'platforms' because 'different' indicates multiple items.

× I often go online very frequently because currently I'm not attending to any universities and I'm planning to join on the winter.

✓ I often go online very frequently because currently I'm not attending any universities and I'm planning to join in the winter.

The verb 'attend' does not require 'to' when referring to universities, and the correct preposition with seasons is 'in', not 'on'.