自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Improve grammar and sentence naturalness: use past tense consistently, reduce redundancy, and make sentences more concise. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Also correct awkward phrases (e.g., “beside the leg”) and use natural collocations (e.g., “with my dad by my side” or “alongside my dad”).

示例: Yes — I had a small red bike when I was a child. It had two training wheels, and I used to ride it in the park every Saturday with my dad beside me. I remember feeling proud when I learned to pedal on my own.

建议: Avoid hesitation fillers and improve accuracy and cohesion. State your main idea directly, use linking words to support it (for example, “because” or “however”), and correct grammar (use past/present appropriately and remove extra words). Be specific about observations and give a brief reason or example.

示例: I don't think bicycles are very popular in Malaysia. For example, when I go out I rarely see people cycling; instead, many more people use motorcycles because they are faster and more convenient for city traffic.

× Yes, I do have a bike when I was a child.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.

The sentence mixes present simple ('do have') with a past time expression ('when I was a child'). Use past simple 'had' to match the past time reference. Suggestion: use consistent tense with time markers (e.g., 'when I was a child I had...').

× The bike is a small bike and it is in red colour and there are two training wheels there.

✓ The bike was small and it was red, and it had two training wheels.

The original uses present tense 'is' with past context and awkward adjective phrasing 'in red colour'. Also repetition of 'bike' is unnecessary. Use past tense 'was' and natural adjective order: 'was small', 'was red', and 'had two training wheels.' Prefer 'red' rather than 'red colour.'

× I used to ride this bike with my dad beside the leg at the park every Saturday.

✓ I used to ride this bike with my dad beside me at the park every Saturday.

Phrase 'beside the leg' is incorrect and unclear. Use the correct prepositional phrase 'beside me' to indicate location relative to the speaker. 'Used to ride' correctly expresses a habitual past action; keep it in past form.

× Umm, I don't really think that bikes are popular in my country 'cause when I am out I don't really see a lot of people S cycling, but I see motorcycles.

✓ Umm, I don't really think that bikes are popular in my country because when I am out I don't see many people cycling; I see more motorcycles.

Minor issues: casual 'cause' should be 'because' in formal speech. 'Don't really see a lot of people S cycling' contains an extra 'S' and awkward quantifier. Use 'don't see many people cycling' for correct quantifier and verb usage. Also 'see more motorcycles' is clearer than simply 'see motorcycles.' Maintain present simple for general statements.

× So I think motorcycle in is very popular in Malaysia.

✓ So I think motorcycles are very popular in Malaysia.

Original has word order and number errors: 'motorcycle in is' is incorrect word order and singular 'motorcycle' doesn't agree with plural notion 'are very popular.' Use plural 'motorcycles' with plural verb 'are' and correct word order 'are very popular in Malaysia.'