自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more grammatical, concise, and add a bit of detail. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, avoid repetition, correct word order, and add one or two specific details (where you rode it or how you felt). Use a linking word if you add a supporting sentence.

示例: Yes, I did. When I was nine, my father bought me a bright red bike as a birthday present. I used to ride it around my neighborhood every afternoon after school, which made me feel very independent and happy.

建议: Give a direct opinion, use clearer sentence structure, and avoid informal words like 'bigly'. Provide reasons and a short comparison using linking words (for example, 'because' and 'however'). Use correct names and phrasing for role models.

示例: I don't think bicycles are very popular in Malaysia. Instead, sports like badminton are much more popular because of famous players such as Lee Chong Wei and Goh V Shem, who inspire many people. As a result, more people prefer watching and playing badminton than cycling.

× Yeah, I have a bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike.

The examiner asked about a past situation ('when you were a child'), so the student should use the past tense. Using present tense 'have' is inconsistent with the time frame. Improve by matching tense to context: use 'had' for possessions in the past.

× When I was when I was nine years old, my father bought for me as a birthday present.

✓ When I was nine years old, my father bought me one as a birthday present.

Errors: repetition ('when I was' twice), incorrect word order ('bought for me'), and missing object ('one' or 'a bike'). The verb 'bought' is correct past tense but the indirect object should follow the verb ('bought me'). Remove repetition and add the object for clarity. Suggestion: simplify to 'When I was nine, my father bought me a bike as a birthday present.'

× My country is Malaysia but I think that bike is not very popular in my country.

✓ My country is Malaysia, but I think bikes are not very popular there.

Problems: article use and number. 'That bike' refers to a specific bike, but the student means bikes in general, so use plural 'bikes' without 'the' and change 'in my country' repetition to 'there'. Also adjust verb agreement to plural subject 'bikes are'. Improve by using plural for general statements and avoid repeating 'my country'.

× I think that badminton this sport is quite popular in my country like because the role models such as Lee Chong Wei and GOH Bishan, they affect us bigly.

✓ I think the sport of badminton is quite popular in my country because role models such as Lee Chong Wei and Goh Vengsark (GOH Bishan) have a big influence on us.

Multiple issues: word order and filler words ('badminton this sport'), redundant discourse marker 'like', incorrect capitalisation and name formatting, awkward adverb 'bigly' (nonstandard), and unnecessary pronoun 'they' after 'such as' phrase. Also verb choice: 'affect' is grammatically possible but 'have a big influence on' is natural. Improve by using 'the sport of badminton' or 'badminton', remove 'like', use standard vocabulary ('big influence' not 'bigly'), and keep names correctly capitalized. Note: if name 'Goh Bishan' is intended, keep correct real name; ensure proper nouns are accurate.