自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise, grammatically correct and logical. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., “No, I didn’t have a bike as a child.”), then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words (e.g., “However” or “because”). Correct tense and article errors, avoid repetition, and finish with a complete sentence. Keep the answer to no more than 3–4 sentences.

示例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I always wanted a small pink bike with training wheels because I thought it looked fun and safe. As a result, I felt envious whenever I saw other children riding, and I finally got my first bike a few years later.

建议: Give a clear topic sentence then add specific reasons or examples and use linking words. Correct word choices and remove filler words (like “uh” and “like”). Use plural/singular correctly and avoid repeating the same idea. Limit to 2–3 sentences that include reasons or examples to support your view.

示例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, particularly road and mountain bikes. For example, many teenagers and young adults ride together for exercise or socialising, and you can often see groups cycling along city lanes or in parks on weekends.

× I didn't have a bike when I was a child but it has been my dream since when I was young.

✓ I didn't have a bike when I was a child, but it had been my dream since I was young.

The sentence mixes past simple ('didn't have') with present perfect ('has been') incorrectly. When referring to a dream that started in the past and continued up to another past time (childhood), use past perfect ('had been') or keep present perfect if you mean up to now. Here the context is about childhood, so past perfect 'had been' is appropriate. Suggestion: choose consistent time frame verbs: either 'I didn't have a bike... but it has been my dream since I was young' (meaning still a dream now) or '...but it had been my dream since I was young' (referring to that past period).

× Especially like the small pink ones with extra wheels on the side.

✓ I especially liked the small pink ones with extra wheels on the sides.

The original lacks a clear subject and uses present tense 'like' while narrating past events. Also 'wheel on the side' should be plural 'wheels on the sides'. Correct by adding past tense verb 'liked' and plural 'sides'. Suggestion: include subject and match verb tense to the surrounding sentences: 'I especially liked...'.

× Two wheels on the side.

✓ They had two extra wheels on the sides.

This fragment lacks a subject and verb, making it a sentence fragment. To correct, provide a subject ('they') and a verb ('had') to form a complete clause, and pluralize 'sides' to match 'wheels'. Suggestion: combine with the previous sentence or make it a full sentence: 'They had two extra wheels on the sides.'.

× I often get jealous with children who have bike when I was young.

✓ I often got jealous of children who had bikes when I was young.

Several issues: tense should be past ('got') to match 'when I was young'; preposition with 'jealous' is 'of' not 'with'; 'bike' should be plural 'bikes' to refer generally; 'have' should be past 'had' for the same past timeframe. Suggestion: use 'jealous of' and keep past tense consistency: 'I often got jealous of children who had bikes when I was young.'.

× I think I've had my first bike when.

✓ I think I got my first bike when I was a child.

The clause 'I've had my first bike when' is ungrammatical: present perfect with a specific past time ('when') is incorrect; the sentence is also incomplete. Use past simple 'got' with a time clause: 'I got my first bike when I was a child' or complete the time: 'I think I got my first bike when I was ten.' Suggestion: use past simple for actions at a specific past time.

× Yes, I think bikes are popular in my country, especially the road bikes and the mountain bikes.

✓ Yes, I think bikes are popular in my country, especially road bikes and mountain bikes.

Article use is awkward: when speaking generally about types, omit 'the' before plural nouns. The present tense 'are popular' is correct. Suggestion: remove 'the' to make the general statement sound natural: 'especially road bikes and mountain bikes.'.

× I often see a lot of people, especially the adolescents and like the young to go cycling with their friends.

✓ I often see a lot of people, especially adolescents and young people, going cycling with their friends.

Problems: 'the adolescents' and 'the young' are unnatural; 'a lot of people' with an awkward clause follows; use 'adolescents and young people' without 'the'. Also 'to go cycling' should be the -ing form 'going cycling' to show ongoing action. Suggestion: use natural noun phrases and gerund after 'see': 'see people going cycling.'.

× I often see them uh beside the streets and.

✓ I often see them beside the streets.

The original has filler 'uh' and an unfinished conjunction 'and' making it incomplete. 'Beside the streets' is acceptable but 'on the sidewalks' or 'along the streets' may be more natural. Suggestion: remove fillers and finish the thought: 'I often see them along the streets.'.