公园— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and use correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (umm), and provide one specific supporting detail. Use plural/singular correctly and correct prepositions.

示例: No, I didn't. I grew up in a small village that had no parks or playgrounds, only muddy, uneven roads where children played. As a result, we usually made our own games in open fields.

建议: Use correct verb forms and clearer vocabulary. Begin with a topic sentence, then add one or two specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, so). Avoid awkward phrases like "provides my eyes very comfortable."

示例: Yes, I do. I now live in Pokhara, which has many parks, and I often visit them because they are relaxing and full of greenery, which is easy on my eyes and helps me unwind.

建议: Clarify your ideas and correct word choice (e.g., 'depressed' is wrong). Use one clear reason per sentence and link them. Remove hesitations and fix grammar (plural/singular).

示例: Yes, I would. More parks would encourage social interaction and give people a pleasant place to relax, relieving stress from daily responsibilities.

建议: Avoid colloquial contractions like 'wanna' in the test. Be specific about which park and why; use linking words and correct grammar. Mention one or two concrete features (location, facilities).

示例: Yes. For example, I would like to visit Ratna Park in Kathmandu because it is centrally located, feels safe, and has benches and walking paths where I could relax and practise speaking with other visitors.

× No I came from village so my village didn't have any sort of park or grounds to play.

✓ No, I came from a village, so my village didn't have any parks or grounds to play on.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before 'village' and incorrect pluralization/word choice: 'park or grounds' should be 'parks or grounds' and add preposition 'on' after 'play'. Use commas for clarity. Suggestion: Use 'a village' for singular countable nouns and pluralize 'parks' when referring to any kind of park in general.

× It had only umm muddy or a rough roads to walk only.

✓ It only had muddy, rough roads to walk on.

Incorrect article 'a' before plural 'roads' and awkward word order. 'Only' placement and commas for adjectives are needed. Also add preposition 'on' after 'walk'. Suggestion: Place limiting word 'only' before the verb phrase and use adjective order 'muddy, rough roads'.

× Currently I'm at the Pokhara so my city have many parks and I do like to visit them as it is very relaxing and it has many greeneries which provides my eyes very comfortable or comforts.

✓ Currently I'm in Pokhara, so my city has many parks and I like to visit them because they are very relaxing and have a lot of greenery, which is comfortable for my eyes.

Wrong preposition 'at' should be 'in' for a city. Subject-verb agreement: 'city has' not 'city have'. Awkward modal/auxiliary 'do like' unnecessary. 'It is' should agree in number with 'parks' so use 'they are'. 'Greeneries' is incorrect plural; use 'greenery'. 'Provides my eyes very comfortable' is ungrammatical; use 'is comfortable for my eyes'. Suggestion: Use correct preposition, ensure subject-verb agreement, and choose correct nouns ('greenery') and adjective structures.

× Yes, I would like to see more parks in the city as it makes uh, people umm, establish new relationships and be more, uh, depressed, free from their, uh, daily walk and responsibilities.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in the city because they help people establish new relationships and feel less stressed, free from their daily routines and responsibilities.

Agreement and article/reference: 'it makes people establish' is incorrect because 'parks' is plural; use 'they help people'. 'Be more depressed' is wrong meaning; likely intended 'less stressed' or 'relaxed'. 'Daily walk' is awkward; 'daily routines' fits better. Suggestion: Match plural subjects with plural verbs/pronouns and choose appropriate adjectives ('less stressed' instead of 'depressed').

× And yeah, I I do like seeing more park in my city.

✓ And yeah, I do like seeing more parks in my city.

Singular/plural mismatch: 'more park' should be 'more parks' when referring to additional park(s). Suggestion: Use plural noun after 'more' when indicating an increased number of countable items.

× Yes, there are many parks that I want to go in the future.

✓ Yes, there are many parks that I want to go to in the future.

Missing preposition 'to' after 'go'. The tense 'want to go in the future' is acceptable, but common phrasing is 'want to visit in the future'. Suggestion: Use 'go to' or 'visit' to indicate movement toward a place.

× As an example, I wanna go at the Kathmandu's park.

✓ For example, I want to go to Kathmandu's park.

Incorrect preposition 'at' should be 'to' after 'go'. 'Wanna' is informal; use 'want to'. Using 'the' with a city name is unnecessary; 'Kathmandu's park' or 'a park in Kathmandu' is better. Suggestion: Use 'go to' and formal 'want to' in a test context.

× It is safe and it is convenient.

✓ It is safe and convenient.

Redundant repetition of 'it is' is not grammatically wrong but stylistically weak. Combine adjectives with a single 'it is'. Suggestion: Use concise phrasing: 'It is safe and convenient.'

× It makes me relax and it makes people establish their communication skill.

✓ It helps me relax and helps people improve their communication skills.

'Makes me relax' is awkward; 'helps me relax' is natural. 'Establish their communication skill' is incorrect collocation and singular/plural mismatch: use 'improve their communication skills'. Suggestion: Use appropriate verbs ('help') and pluralize 'skills' for general ability.