视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be direct and concise: start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No + short reason). Avoid repetition and grammatical errors. Use one or two supporting details with linking words (for example, because/so). Keep the answer under five sentences.

示例: Not really. I rarely take landscape photos because I usually just snap quick shots to show my family I'm celebrating. For example, last Christmas in Mississauga I took a few photos and sent them to my relatives, but I don't consider myself good at photography.

建议: Begin with a clear topic sentence stating your preference (I prefer rural/urban views). Use linking words (because, for example) and give one specific supporting detail or short example. Correct small grammatical mistakes and avoid hesitations or repeated words.

示例: I prefer rural views because they are quieter and more scenic. For example, I often drive to the countryside to take long walks and enjoy peaceful landscapes, which helps me relax.

建议: Give a direct answer first (It depends, but I usually prefer...). Clarify the criteria you use (maintenance, cleanliness) with a linking word (because/for example). Use one clear example and avoid fragmented sentences; be specific about places and why you like them.

示例: It depends, but I usually prefer places that are well maintained because cleanliness and preservation make views more enjoyable. For example, I admire historic sites like Navratan Mahal for its architecture, and well-kept parks in Mississauga are also pleasant places to visit.

× No, actually I the most of the time the only picture I have ever taken was just to show my family that I am outside and I'm celebrating.

✓ No, actually most of the time the only pictures I have ever taken were just to show my family that I was outside and celebrating.

The original sentence has word order and article issues and inconsistent tense. 'I the most of the time' is ungrammatical; use 'most of the time'. 'Picture' should be plural 'pictures' when combined with 'most of the time' and 'have ever taken'. The clause 'I am outside and I'm celebrating' refers to past events so use past tense 'I was outside and celebrating'. Also change 'was just to show' to fit plural 'were just to show'. Fixing word order and number makes the sentence coherent.

× Like the last year in on Christmas I was in Mississauga and celebrating Christmas and I took some pictures and sent it to my family just to show them and I'm very bad at taking pictures.

✓ Like last year on Christmas I was in Mississauga, celebrating Christmas; I took some pictures and sent them to my family just to show them, and I'm very bad at taking pictures.

Remove the extra article 'the' before 'last year' and the extra preposition 'in'. Use a comma to separate clauses. 'Sent it to my family' is incorrect because 'pictures' is plural, so use 'sent them to my family'. Keep present tense 'I'm very bad' if the speaker still considers themselves poor at taking pictures. Use present participle 'celebrating' correctly as a reduced clause.

× Would you really? Areas are more quiet, peaceful and scenic so I prefer more of that and I usually go on the countryside to take a take a walk and even go on a long drive sometimes as well.

✓ Rural areas are quieter, more peaceful, and more scenic, so I prefer them. I usually go to the countryside to take a walk and sometimes go on long drives.

'Would you really?' is irrelevant to the question and removed. 'Areas are more quiet' should be 'Rural areas are quieter' (comparative adjective). Use parallel comparative forms 'more peaceful' and 'more scenic' or 'quieter'. 'I prefer more of that' is vague; use 'I prefer them'. Preposition 'on the countryside' is incorrect; use 'to the countryside'. Remove duplicate 'take a' and change 'a long drive' to plural 'long drives' for general habit. These corrections fix adjective forms, pronouns, and prepositions.

× Well that depends on the place and how quiet well they will be maintained by the government or the people around who live there like Navratan Mahal.

✓ Well, that depends on the place and how well it will be maintained by the government or by the people who live there, like Navratan Mahal.

The sentence mixed subjects and misplaced adverbs. 'How quiet well they will be maintained' is ungrammatical; correct order is 'how well it will be maintained'. Use singular 'it' to refer to 'the place'. Add commas for clarity. 'People around who live there' should be 'people who live there'. This fixes word order and article/pronoun reference.

× It is one of these having wonders and it is quite beautiful.

✓ It is one of those wonders and is quite beautiful.

The phrase 'one of these having wonders' is ungrammatical. Use the fixed expression 'one of those wonders' to indicate a notable place. Omit the repeated subject in the second clause for conciseness: 'and is quite beautiful'.

× Other than that in even in Mississauga there are some places like a parks and which are well maintained.

✓ Even in Mississauga there are some places, like parks, which are well maintained.

Remove 'Other than that' which is unnecessary. 'In even in Mississauga' duplicates 'in'; use 'Even in Mississauga'. 'Some places like a parks' uses incorrect article 'a' before plural 'parks'—remove 'a'. Place commas around the example 'like parks'. This fixes preposition and article errors and improves clarity.