视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and organized: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (umm, ah), correct grammar (e.g. "capturing memories"), and add one specific reason or example. Keep it to one to three sentences. Use a linking phrase if you add detail (e.g. "because" or "for example").

示例: Yes, I do. I enjoy taking pictures because they help me capture memories and revisit special moments. For example, I often photograph family gatherings so I can remember how everyone looked and felt that day.

建议: Answer directly and cleanly: begin with a clear statement, use correct noun forms ("scenery" not plural), and use linking words to explain reasons. Replace vague words with specific details and avoid fillers. Limit to two or three sentences.

示例: I prefer rural views. In the countryside there is more natural scenery—fields, forests and quiet lakes—which I find relaxing, and I enjoy photographing those peaceful landscapes because they help me unwind.

建议: Clarify and organize your answer: state your preference clearly, eliminate confusing or contradictory phrases ("bad scenery" then "best view"), and give one clear specific example of a place and why it matters. Use correct vocabulary ("heritage sites", "temples") and two sentences maximum.

示例: I prefer views in my own country because they reflect our culture and history. For example, the old temple in my hometown is a beautiful heritage site with ornate carvings and peaceful gardens, and photographing it reminds me of our traditions.

× Yes I do. Taking pictures is like the capture of the memories, not even in your brand but also umm have the proof to A have a proof for you to umm look at it later on.

✓ Yes, I do. Taking pictures is like capturing memories; they are not about brands but provide proof for you to look at later.

The original sentence uses incorrect and unnecessary articles ('the capture of the memories') and awkward phrasing. Use the gerund 'capturing' instead of 'the capture of' to make the action natural. Remove 'the' before 'memories' because it refers to memories in general. Replace unclear clauses with 'they are not about brands but provide proof' for clarity. Also add commas and a semicolon to improve sentence flow.

× Umm, I prefer yours in rural areas because I think in the rural areas there are many scenery good things to capture and preserve as it can make me relax and I feel rejoice.

✓ Umm, I prefer views in rural areas because I think there is a lot of beautiful scenery to capture and preserve; it helps me relax and makes me happy.

Problems: wrong word 'yours' should be 'views'; awkward noun phrase 'many scenery good things' should be 'a lot of beautiful scenery' or 'many good scenes'. Use 'there is' for uncountable 'scenery' (article error/subject-verb agreement). Use present tense consistently: 'it helps me relax and makes me happy.' Replace 'I feel rejoice' with natural expression 'makes me happy.'

× Actually, I do prefer views in my own country because you know, in my country, umm, there's a bad scenery at scenery Brewing, which is called the heritage sites temple that represent my country that is on call. What temples at there? There's a best view in this, in this.

✓ Actually, I prefer views in my own country because there are heritage temples that represent my country; some of them are famous for their poor conservation, but they still offer great views.

Multiple issues: incorrect noun usage 'bad scenery at scenery Brewing' is unclear; use 'heritage temples' or 'heritage sites' to be precise (article and noun choice). Use plural 'there are' with plural 'temples' (subject-verb agreement). Replace awkward questions and repetitions with a concise statement. Maintain present tense and use clear vocabulary ('poor conservation' rather than 'bad scenery').