视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence, correct grammar, avoid vague phrases, and give one or two specific examples. Use linking words if needed.

示例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, I often photograph sunsets and rainy scenes near Lake Dubs because the colours and reflections make the photos look dramatic.

建议: Give a concise topic sentence, correct word choice, avoid repetition, and add a clear reason or specific detail. Replace unclear words (e.g. 'fights') with the intended word (e.g. 'life' or 'activity').

示例: I prefer urban views because I love the city lights after dark. For instance, I enjoy photographing busy streets and illuminated buildings since the activity and reflections create interesting compositions.

建议: Start with a clear, direct answer, avoid hesitations and incorrect words ('weeds' → 'views'), and give specific reasons and examples. Keep it concise and logical using linking words.

示例: I prefer views in other countries because I find their urban design more modern. For example, I admire Seoul for its skyline and organised public spaces, which contrast with the developing urban landscapes where I live in Ethiopia.

× 'Yes, I do like taking pictures of different views, specially sunsets are rains or something related to Lake Dubs.'

✓ 'Yes, I do like taking pictures of different views, especially sunsets, rains, or places around Lake Dubs.'

'specially' is incorrect here; the correct adverb is 'especially'. Also the phrase 'sunsets are rains' is ungrammatical and unclear; use a list separated by commas and 'places around Lake Dubs' to convey location. Suggestion: use 'especially' to modify the following examples and ensure parallel items in the list.'

× 'Honestly I like this on urban areas because at night I enjoy watching lights at night and when the city is full of fights, you know it feels enjoyable and it's clean in urban areas, that's why.'

✓ 'Honestly, I like this in urban areas because at night I enjoy watching the lights, and when the city is lively it feels enjoyable and cleaner in urban areas.'

'on urban areas' is incorrect preposition; use 'in urban areas'. The phrase 'watching lights at night' is repetitive — remove the extra 'at night'. 'Full of fights' is likely a wrong word; 'lively' fits intended meaning. Use comparative 'cleaner' to compare urban to other areas. Also add commas for clarity.'

× 'Honestly I like this on urban areas because at night I enjoy watching lights at night and when the city is full of fights, you know it feels enjoyable and it's clean in urban areas, that's why.'

✓ 'Honestly, I like this in urban areas because at night I enjoy watching the lights, and when the city is lively it feels enjoyable and cleaner in urban areas.'

'it feels enjoyable and it's clean' repeats pronoun 'it' awkwardly and mixes ideas. Combine into 'it feels enjoyable and cleaner' to refer to the city more naturally. Ensure pronoun reference is clear and not repetitive.'

× 'I prefer weeds in another country because, uh, currently I'm living in Ethiopia and uh, Ethiopia is a developing country and uh, it's not that much developed.'

✓ 'I prefer views in other countries because I am currently living in Ethiopia, which is a developing country and not very developed.'

'weeds' is incorrect word choice; likely meant 'views'. 'in another country' is acceptable but 'in other countries' is more natural. 'not that much developed' is ungrammatical — use 'not very developed' or 'less developed'. Also avoid filler 'uh' in formal responses.'

× 'So especially or specifically, I like watching Korean cities, especially Seoul. It is fascinating and the city.'

✓ 'Specifically, I like watching Korean cities, especially Seoul; it is fascinating.'

'So especially or specifically' is redundant and awkward; choose one. The fragment 'It is fascinating and the city.' is ungrammatical — 'the city' is unnecessary. Combine into a single clear sentence: 'Specifically, I like Korean cities, especially Seoul; it is fascinating.'