视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Make the answer more concise and correct small grammar mistakes. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific supporting detail and one short example. Avoid repetition like "been for been to" and unnecessary words such as "the photos I take" repeated ideas.

示例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views, especially when I visit a new place. For example, last year I took photos of a coastal village that reminded me of the trip whenever I looked at them, helping me remember the light and atmosphere.

建议: Improve grammar and clarity: give a clear topic sentence then one or two specific supporting reasons using linking words (for example, because, also). Correct tense and word choice (e.g., "I grew up in the city", "urban scene", "cafés"). Avoid vague words like "household and fossil."

示例: I prefer urban views because I grew up in the city and feel more comfortable there. For example, I enjoy photographing busy streets and cafés, since the crowds and street life make the city feel lively and energetic.

建议: Clarify and correct factual confusion and grammar. Provide a clear topic sentence stating preference, then give a reason and a specific example. Avoid incorrect references (e.g., Vienna is in Austria, not China) and tighten sentences to stay within 3–4 sentences.

示例: I prefer views in my own country because I haven't traveled abroad yet and there are many regions in China I want to explore first. For instance, I hope to visit the mountains in Yunnan someday to photograph their dramatic scenery and cool climate.

× I haven't been for been to before.

✓ I haven't been to before.

The phrase contains an extra past participle 'been' causing redundancy. Use the correct present perfect structure 'haven't been to' + place. Remove the extra 'been' to form 'I haven't been to (that place) before.'

× The photos I take help me capture and preserve the memories of the trip and looking at the pictures later can bring me back to that happy moment.

✓ The photos I take help me capture and preserve the memories of the trip, and looking at the pictures later can bring me back to that happy moment.

This sentence needs a coordinating conjunction with correct punctuation to join two independent clauses. Adding a comma before 'and' clarifies the sentence structure. No tense change required; this fixes sentence structure (compound sentence) and readability.

× I prefer views in urban areas because I was born grow up in the city so the city the scenery in the city makes me more comfortable and I love the household and fossil in the city.

✓ I prefer views in urban areas because I was born and grew up in the city, so the scenery there makes me feel more comfortable, and I love the houses and hustle in the city.

Multiple issues: 'was born grow up' is incorrect; use 'was born and grew up' (correct verb forms and conjunction). Repetition 'the city the scenery in the city' is redundant; replace with 'the scenery there'. 'Household and fossil' is incorrect vocabulary; likely intended 'houses and hustle' or 'households and bustle.' I changed to 'houses and hustle' to convey urban activity. Use commas to separate clauses for clarity.

× For example, I love watching people staying in Cafe and this make me feel like life is full of energy.

✓ For example, I love watching people sitting in cafes, and this makes me feel like life is full of energy.

Use 'sitting' rather than 'staying' to describe people occupying seats in a cafe. 'Cafe' should be plural 'cafes' to match general reference. Subject-verb agreement: 'this make' should be 'this makes' because 'this' is singular. Add a comma before 'and' to join clauses.

× I prefer views in my own country. I haven't travelled abroad before and because China is really large country, I really want to visit other cities first.

✓ I prefer views in my own country. I haven't traveled abroad before, and because China is a really large country, I really want to visit other cities first.

Add the article 'a' before 'really large country' ('a really large country'). Also include a comma before 'and' to connect clauses. Spelling of 'travelled' can be British; I used American 'traveled' — either is acceptable but be consistent.

× For example, I love the mountains in Vienna, the climate there, so I'm really hoping that I can travel there one day.

✓ For example, I love the mountains and the climate in Vienna, so I'm really hoping I can travel there one day.

Combine related nouns with 'and' to avoid choppy listing: 'the mountains and the climate in Vienna.' Remove the comma splice by inserting 'so' and removing the extra comma. Also 'hoping that I can' can be simplified to 'hoping I can' for natural speech.