视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples with linking words. Avoid redundancy and incorrect phrases (e.g. “I always have my camera with me,” not “have myself on”).

示例: Yes, I do. I often carry my camera because I enjoy photographing natural scenes. For example, I frequently take photos of the sky at sunset and interesting tree shapes, which help me remember peaceful moments.

建议: Give a direct preference and support it with clear reasons and linking words. Correct vocabulary and grammar (e.g. “lights” not “lies”, “best environment” not “beast environment”). Keep to 2–3 sentences maximum.

示例: I prefer rural views because they offer peaceful natural scenery and beautiful sunsets. However, I also enjoy urban skylines at night for their impressive lights and modern architecture.

建议: Answer directly and give specific reasons. Fix grammar (e.g. “other countries also have good views,” “I prefer my own country”). Use concrete details like types of natural features and emotional impact, in 2–3 sentences.

示例: Although other countries have impressive cityscapes, I prefer the views in my own country because of its varied natural scenery, such as mountains, forests and coastal areas. These landscapes are very striking and often attract both locals and visitors.

× So I always have myself on everywhere I go just to click pictures of the random things that I find very beautiful, like examples, the sky, the trees, like anything that's beautiful.

✓ So I always have my camera with me everywhere I go just to take pictures of random things that I find beautiful, for example the sky, the trees, or anything else that is beautiful.

Original uses incorrect reflexive phrasing 'have myself on' and 'click pictures' (informal/incorrect verb choice). This falls under verb + -ing/form errors and sentence structure. Use 'have my camera with me' and 'take pictures' (correct verb). Also improve list phrasing and remove redundant words.

× But because in urban areas we can see the views of the very high buildings and lies mainly during the night time.

✓ In urban areas we can see views of very tall buildings, especially at night.

Sentence is awkward and contains 'lies' incorrectly; this is a sentence structure error. Simplify structure: 'In urban areas we can see views of very tall buildings' and 'especially at night' conveys intended meaning. Also replace 'very high' with 'very tall' for naturalness.

× So we can see a very big picture that's very classy.

✓ They create a dramatic, classy skyline.

Original is vague and unidiomatic ('very big picture that's very classy'). This is a sentence structure/word choice problem. Rewriting to 'They create a dramatic, classy skyline' makes the idea clear and concise.

× But at the same time, in the rural areas, we can just capture the beast environment, mainly the sunset that.

✓ But at the same time, in rural areas we can capture the best natural environment, especially the sunsets.

Original has 'beast' instead of 'best' (word error) and awkward 'mainly the sunset that.' This is verb + -ing/word choice and sentence structure. Use 'capture the best natural environment' and 'especially the sunsets' for clarity and correct noun agreement.

× Uh, two other countries have the very good view too of the very because of the very high buildings and classic things.

✓ Other countries also have very good views because of tall buildings and classic architecture.

Original is ungrammatical and redundant ('the very good view too of the very because of the very'). This is a sentence structure and word choice issue. Simplify to 'Other countries also have very good views because of tall buildings and classic architecture.'

× But I definitely prefer of my own because my country is, uh, filled with a natural resources and beauty, which is captivize and capture the people's heart.

✓ But I definitely prefer my own country because it is filled with natural resources and beauty, which captivates and captures people's hearts.

Original uses incorrect preposition 'prefer of' and article 'a natural resources' and wrong verb forms 'is captivize and capture.' These are preposition, article, and verb form errors. Correct to 'prefer my own country', 'filled with natural resources' (no 'a'), and 'which captivates and captures people's hearts' (subject-verb agreement and correct verb forms). Also change 'the people's heart' to plural 'people's hearts' for naturalness.

× which is captivize and capture the people's heart.

✓ which captivates and captures people's hearts.

Verbs referring to singular subject 'which' must be in third person singular form. 'Captivates' and 'captures' are the correct third person singular present forms. Also use plural 'people's hearts' for natural expression.

× my country is, uh, filled with a natural resources and beauty,

✓ my country is filled with natural resources and beauty,

Using 'a' before 'natural resources' is incorrect because 'resources' is plural and does not need an article. Remove 'a' to correct the article error.

× So I always have myself on everywhere I go just to click pictures

✓ So I always have my camera with me everywhere I go just to take pictures

'Have myself on' is incorrect pronoun/reflexive usage. Use 'have my camera with me' to show possession and correct pronoun use; also replace informal 'click pictures' with 'take pictures.'

× the very high buildings and classic things

✓ very tall buildings and classic architecture

'Classic things' is vague and unidiomatic. Use noun 'architecture' and adjective 'tall' rather than 'high' for buildings. This corrects adjective/adverb and word choice issues.

× anything that's beautiful.

✓ anything that is beautiful.

Contraction 'that's' is acceptable colloquially but in formal speaking 'that is' is clearer; there is no plural issue here but keep phrase unchanged. If considering plural, 'anything that is beautiful' matches singular 'anything.'