视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Reduce hesitation and repetition, use a clear topic sentence then one supporting detail with a linking phrase. Keep it within 3–4 sentences and avoid filler words. Also correct small grammar errors (e.g., remove repeated words and use 'when' correctly).

示例: Yes, I really enjoy photographing different views. For example, on weekends I often visit parks or city streets and take photos to add to my gallery. I find it relaxing and it helps me remember special places.

建议: Provide a clearer contrast using linking words and correct collocations (e.g., 'hustle of urban areas', 'a sense of calm and peace'). Limit to 2–3 sentences and give a brief reason for each preference.

示例: It depends on my mood. When I want excitement I prefer urban views because the hustle and vibrant street scenes inspire me; however, for relaxation I choose rural landscapes because they give me a sense of calm and peace.

建议: Be concise and avoid redundancy (e.g., 'other views in other foreign countries' is repetitive). Use one linking phrase to show balance and give a short reason why you like each. Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

示例: I prefer both. At home I can easily find familiar landscapes that I love photographing, but when I travel abroad I enjoy capturing unfamiliar scenes and different cultures, which broadens my perspective.

× I when I when I see the beautiful view I try to take a picture and keep it in my gallery.

✓ When I see a beautiful view, I try to take a picture and keep it in my gallery.

The original sentence contains repeated fragments ('I when I when I') and lacks proper word order. This is a sentence structure error (ID 26). Remove the repeated words and start with 'When' to form a subordinate clause, use the indefinite article 'a' before 'beautiful view' because it is a singular, countable noun, and add a comma after the subordinate clause for correct punctuation and clarity. Suggestion: avoid repeating phrases and ensure subordinate clauses are positioned before the main clause when appropriate.

× Sometimes I, I'm really inspired by, uh, hassle of urban areas and sometimes I really love rural areas because it, uh, I feel it like calm and, uh, peace.

✓ Sometimes I'm really inspired by the hustle of urban areas, and sometimes I really love rural areas because I feel calm and at peace there.

Multiple issues: 'hassle' is the wrong word; the correct noun is 'hustle' (ID 13 incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs / word choice). The phrase 'I feel it like calm and peace' is ungrammatical and unclear (ID 26 sentence structure error and ID 22/article errors). Use 'I feel calm and at peace there' to express the state clearly. Include 'the' before 'hustle' if referring to a general concept ('the hustle of urban areas'). Also remove filler interjections and redundant commas. Suggestion: choose correct collocations ('hustle and bustle' or 'the hustle') and use standard expressions 'feel calm' and 'be at peace'.

× Honestly, I prefer both of them because sometimes I can catch a beautiful landscape in my own country and other time when I have a chance to travel I like taking a picture of other views in other foreign countries.

✓ Honestly, I prefer both because sometimes I can catch a beautiful landscape in my own country, and other times when I have a chance to travel I like taking pictures of views in foreign countries.

Several issues: 'both of them' is unnecessary when referring to two categories; 'both' suffices (ID 14 incorrect use of quantifiers). 'Other time' should be 'other times' (ID 1 singular and plural issue). 'Taking a picture of other views in other foreign countries' is repetitive—use plural 'pictures' and remove redundant 'other' (ID 26 sentence structure error and ID 14 quantifier). Also 'foreign countries' already implies 'other', so 'other' is redundant. Suggestion: use plural forms when speaking about repeated occasions ('other times') and avoid redundant words; use plural 'pictures' for general habitual actions.