视图— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct common errors (e.g., 'text' -> 'take', tense and modal use). Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific reason or example. Avoid fillers ('uh', 'umm') and reduce repetition. Keep to 2–3 sentences and use linking words if adding detail.

示例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of beautiful places I visit. For example, I take pictures so I can share them with my family and friends when I return home and show them what the place looked like.

建议: Clarify preference with correct vocabulary and grammar ('urban area', 'rural'). Give one clear preference or say it depends and explain briefly with specific reasons. Use linking words (e.g., 'because', 'however') and avoid vague phrases and filler sounds. Keep sentences short and accurate.

示例: It depends on my mood. I like urban views because the parks and riverwalks help me relax, but I also enjoy rural views for fresh air, local food and peaceful countryside walks.

建议: Make the response more fluent and correct tense errors ('haven't had a chance', 'other countries'). Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific reasons or a short plan. Reduce hesitation and redundant clauses.

示例: I enjoy beautiful views both at home and abroad. I appreciate my country's scenery, but I also hope to visit other countries soon to see famous landmarks and different landscapes.

× I usually text a lot of good, uh, pictures and photo of a beautiful place that I visited because I wanna when I go back home, I can, I could share it to my friends, my family and show them how beautiful the place was.

✓ I usually take a lot of good pictures and photos of a beautiful place that I visited because when I go back home, I can share them with my friends and my family and show them how beautiful the place was.

The student used 'text' incorrectly instead of the verb 'take' for photographing (wrong verb). Also 'photo' should be plural 'photos' to match 'a lot of'. 'Wanna' is informal and misplaced; removing it clarifies meaning. 'Share it to my friends' is incorrect preposition and pronoun: use 'share them with my friends' because 'pictures' is plural and shared with someone. These are present-tense habitual actions and past reference to 'visited' is correct; adjust verbs and pronouns accordingly.

× I will say it depends. Sometimes I prefer, uh, the view from urban era because it's, it make me feels, uh, relaxes, uh, and uh, connection with the nature.

✓ I would say it depends. Sometimes I prefer the view from urban areas because it makes me feel relaxed and connected to nature.

Several present-tense and subject-verb agreement errors: 'I will say' is better as 'I would say' for a polite tentative statement. 'Urban era' is incorrect vocabulary; use 'urban areas.' 'It make me feels' has subject-verb agreement and incorrect verb forms: use 'it makes me feel.' 'Relaxes' as used is wrong; use the adjective 'relaxed.' 'Connection with the nature' should be 'connected to nature' (preposition and article use). Correct verb forms and prepositions clarify meaning.

× But sometime I would like to go to prefer the CD view because of the good food and shopping.

✓ But sometimes I prefer the countryside view because of the good food and shopping.

'Sometime' should be plural 'sometimes.' 'I would like to go to prefer' is an ungrammatical structure; choose one expression—here 'I prefer' fits. 'CD view' is unclear; likely intended 'countryside view' so replace with 'countryside view.' Also ensure parallelism and economy: 'Because of the good food and shopping' is acceptable but ensure article use if needed. These changes fix word choice and sentence structure.

× Well, I will say I would like to see, uh, beautiful views from both my country and other country because I know there are many beautiful places around the world, but I haven't have a chance to visit it.

✓ Well, I would say I would like to see beautiful views in both my country and other countries because I know there are many beautiful places around the world, but I haven't had a chance to visit them.

'I will say' should be 'I would say' for tentativeness. 'From both my country and other country' needs plural 'other countries' and preposition 'in' rather than 'from.' 'I haven't have a chance' mixes present perfect forms; correct is 'I haven't had a chance.' Pronoun 'it' incorrectly refers to plural 'places'; use 'them.' These changes fix tense, agreement, plurality, and pronoun reference.

× But I would like to, uh, visit, umm, some of the countries soon in the future.

✓ But I would like to visit some of those countries in the near future.

The phrase 'soon in the future' is redundant; prefer 'in the near future.' Also 'some of the countries' is vague—'some of those countries' refers back to previously mentioned countries. Remove filler words and extra commas. This adjustment improves naturalness and tense/time expression.