唱歌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Try to make your answer more natural and concise by correcting grammar and avoiding redundancy. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add specific details using linking words to improve coherence.

示例: Yes, I enjoy singing, especially when I'm alone at home. Although I consider myself a bathroom singer because I don't have a professional voice, I like to sing my favourite song, "Ranja and the Magician" by Argentillo, as it helps me relax.

建议: Improve sentence structure and clarity by using correct verb forms and linking words. Provide more specific details about your experience to enrich your answer.

示例: Yes, I took singing classes for seven days during my summer vacation when I was a child because my mother enrolled me. However, I realized that my voice wasn't very good, so I decided to stop taking lessons.

建议: Make your answer more coherent by using linking words and correcting grammar. Be more specific about your feelings and reasons for singing to yourself.

示例: I don't have a specific person to sing for. Instead, I usually sing to myself when I feel bored or sad because it helps me relax and reduces my stress.

建议: Try to complete your thoughts clearly and use linking words to connect ideas logically. Avoid incomplete sentences and provide specific examples or reasons to support your opinion.

示例: From my perspective, singing can bring happiness to people in many ways. For example, when someone feels sad or stressed, singing can help reduce those feelings and relax the mind. Additionally, singing can lift people's spirits when they are disappointed.

× I think I do not have a good voice to singing any songs.

✓ I think I do not have a good voice to sing any songs.

The verb 'to' (infinitive marker) should be followed by the base form of the verb, not the '-ing' form. Therefore, 'to singing' is incorrect; it should be 'to sing'. This is a common error involving verb forms after 'to'.

× But yes, when I was alone at home so that time I usually sing my favorite song.

✓ But yes, when I was alone at home, I usually sang my favorite song at that time.

The sentence mixes past and present tense incorrectly. Since the time reference is past ('when I was alone'), the verb should be in the past tense ('sang') to maintain tense consistency. Also, 'so that time' is awkward and unnecessary; 'at that time' is clearer.

× My favorite song is Ranja and the magician name is Argentillo.

✓ My favorite song is 'Ranja' and the magician's name is Argentillo.

The phrase 'magician name' lacks the possessive form. It should be 'magician's name' to indicate that the name belongs to the magician. This is a singular possessive noun error.

× my mother had mentioned me in singing classes during my summer vacation.

✓ my mother had enrolled me in singing classes during my summer vacation.

The verb 'mention' is incorrectly used with 'me' here. The correct verb is 'enroll' or 'register' when referring to signing someone up for classes. Also, 'had mentioned me in' is incorrect usage.

× That time I took classes for seven days.

✓ At that time, I took classes for seven days.

The phrase 'That time' is incomplete as a time expression. It should be 'At that time' to correctly indicate a specific past time.

× But after that I I realized that my voice is not very good for singing.

✓ But after that, I realized that my voice was not very good for singing.

The sentence mixes past and present tense incorrectly. Since the realization happened in the past, both verbs should be in the past tense ('realized' and 'was').

× So then I just dropped that plan.

✓ So then, I just dropped that plan.

A comma after 'So then' improves sentence clarity by separating the introductory phrase from the main clause.

× I do not have a specific person that I want to sing for whenever I feel bored as well as when I feel sad that time I usually sing song for myself because it helps me to relax my mind as well as it helps to. As well as it helps to reduce my stress.

✓ I do not have a specific person that I want to sing for. Whenever I feel bored or sad, I usually sing songs for myself because it helps me relax my mind and reduce my stress.

The original sentence is a run-on and contains awkward phrasing. Breaking it into two sentences improves clarity. Also, 'sing song' should be 'sing songs' (plural). The phrase 'helps me to relax my mind as well as it helps to' is incomplete and redundant; it is corrected to 'helps me relax my mind and reduce my stress.'

× From my perspective, singing can bring happiness to people from many ways.

✓ From my perspective, singing can bring happiness to people in many ways.

The preposition 'from' is incorrect here; the correct preposition is 'in' when referring to 'many ways'.

× When people feel sad, emotionless and have stress in their mind that time singing can help to reduce the stress as well as it also relax the mind.

✓ When people feel sad, emotionless, and have stress in their minds, singing can help reduce the stress as well as relax the mind.

The phrase 'that time' is unnecessary and awkward here and is removed. Also, 'stress in their mind' should be 'stress in their minds' to agree in number. The verbs 'help to reduce' and 'also relax' are better expressed without 'to' for parallelism.